The late night comedians welcomed Mike Johnson to the Speakership on their Wednesday shows by not just by noting his generic name, but also labeling him “anti-gay, anti-choice, pro-conspiracy” “dick” who Republicans selected to “bore everyone into forgetting how extreme he is.”
The eponymous host of ABC’s Jimmy Kimmel Live! conceded, “I never heard of him either, but I learned about him today.” What he learned is that, “Mike Johnson defended Donald Trump in one of his impeachment trials in the Senate. He's been called the most important architect of the Electoral College objections that contested the results of the election in 2020. He voted to decertify the results of that election confirming Biden as president. So, he checks off all the important boxes. Also, anti-gay, anti-choice, pro-conspiracy theory. He seems terrific.”
Over at CBS’s The Late Show, Stephen Colbert noted how Johnson was able unify the party, “Finally, a man who appeals to all factions of the Republican Party: The MAGA faithful, the social conservatives, the white nationalists, and the horny Beetlejuice goblins.”
After a bit where Colbert realized he and Johnson share a striking physical resemblance as a “white guy in a suit with glasses,” Colbert observed, “there doesn't appear to be anyone who hates Johnson enough to sabotage his rise. You know what they say about Mike Johnson, ‘To know him is to... meh.’”
However, Colbert cautioned against such an approach:
But don't let the apparent blandness fool you. Johnson is not only an election denier, he played a leading role in the effort to overturn the 2020 election. Johnson has some other extreme views. In newspaper editorials, Johnson has “called homosexuality ‘a inherently unnatural’ and ‘dangerous lifestyle’ that would possibly destroy ‘the democratic system,’ adding “And destroying the entire democratic system is my job, did you know 2020 election was rigged by gender fluid space lasers.
The idea that Johnson is a radical because of 2020 was a constant theme across all the Wednesday comedy shows, but just like scandal-plagued Republicans get more ire from late night than scandal-plagued Democrats, Republicans who cast doubt on elections receive more score than Democrats who do the same.
NBC Late Night host Seth Meyers was no different, “the election deniers nonetheless remain the core of the current Republican Party that's who controls the party, as he evidenced by their selection today of a new speaker, a far-right conservative who almost no one has heard of named Mike Johnson. I think they're hoping to bore everyone into forgetting how extreme he is.”
On Comedy Central’s The Daily Show, temp host Desus Nice introduced Johnson to the audience, “Now if you don't know Mike Johnson, don't worry. Nobody else does. But what they do know is that he wants nationwide limits on abortion. He wants to criminalize gay sex and he even wants to ban Reggaton. Alright, I'm lying on the last one but that seems like his vibe because he comes off as a dick and the one thing that people know about this dude, he was one of the main guys trying to steal the election for Donald Trump.”
Finally, on NBC’s The Tonight Show, Jimmy Fallon remarked that, “Johnson is pretty controversial because he led the effort to overturn the 2020 presidential election so basically, whether or not he won today, he was going to say he did.”
Viewers waiting for those exposés on the “pretty controversial” “far-left” Hakeem Jefferies should not hold their breath.
Here are transcripts for the October-25 taped shows:
ABC Jimmy Kimmel Live!
10/25/2023
11:36 PM ET
JIMMY KIMMEL: It's a big day. If you follow this sort of thing, you know it's a very big day. After three long weeks with no one driving this filthy Greyhound bus we call America we finally have a Speaker of the House and the gavel goes to [drumroll] Mike Johnson of Louisiana. I never heard of him either, but I learned about him today. Mike Johnson defended Donald Trump in one of his impeachment trials in the Senate. He's been called the most important architect of the Electoral College objections that contested the results of the election in 2020. He voted to decertify the results of that election confirming Biden as president. So, he checks off all the important boxes. Also, anti-gay, anti-choice, pro-conspiracy theory. He seems terrific.
***
CBS The Late Show with Stephen Colbert
10/25/2023
11:40 PM ET
STEPHEN COLBERT: Finally, a man who appeals to all factions of the Republican Party: The MAGA faithful, the social conservatives, the white nationalists, and the horny Beetlejuice goblins. Johnson is now second-in-line to the presidency, prompting news outlets to triumphantly proclaim, "Who is representative Mike Johnson?" "Who is Mike Johnson?" "Who is Speaker nominee Mike Johnson?" And "5 secrets to reduce belly fat." Also, "Who the hell is Mike Johnson?" So he's a little innocuous. He's just another boring white guy in a suit with glasses. Wait a second, Jimmy. Put him up again. Hold on. Hold on a second.
Am I Mike Johnson? The fact that no one knows who he is might be Johnson's greatest strength. Because apparently, there doesn't appear to be anyone who hates Johnson enough to sabotage his rise. You know what they say about Mike Johnson, "To know him is to... Meh."
But don't let the apparent blandness fool you. Johnson is not only an election denier, he played a leading role in the effort to overturn the 2020 election. Johnson has some other extreme views. In newspaper editorials, Johnson has “called homosexuality ‘a inherently unnatural’ and ‘dangerous lifestyle’ that would possibly destroy ‘the democratic system,’ adding “And destroying the entire democratic system is my job, did you know 2020 election was rigged by gender fluid space lasers.”
***
NBC Late Night with Seth Meyers
10/26/2023
12:49 AM ET
SETH MEYERS: But at the very least the president’s chief of staff now reportedly confirming he knew the entire time the election fraud stuff was all bull[bleep], and yet the election deniers nonetheless remain the core of the current Republican Party that's who controls the party, as he evidenced by their selection today of a new speaker, a far-right conservative who almost no one has heard of named Mike Johnson. I think they're hoping to bore everyone into forgetting how extreme he is. Mike Johnson that is the fake name they give you when you call tech support so it sounds like you're talking to someone in Kansas when you're definitely talking to somebody in Albania.
"Yes, I am Mike Johnson, did you try unplug and plug in again?" Even his fellow Republicans didn't know much about him Senator Susan Collins -- and this is true -- said she'd have to look him up a reporter from CNN wrote today, "I asked Susan Collins what it would be like to work with Johnson on spending issues and she said she didn't know him but was going to Google him this morning.”
Well, when you Google him, you're going to need to put in more information than just the name Mike Johnson. Mike Johnson is such a common name, most of us went to school with one my Mike Johnson played baseball. This Mike Johnson played a key role in the effort to overturn the 2020 election results and was, according to the New York Times, "the most important architect of the electoral college objections on January 6th." But Republicans desperately do not want to talk about that, as evidenced by this press conference last night, where a reporter tried to ask Mike Fake Name about his effort to overturn the election and the group of Republicans assembled and literally booed the reporter
***
Comedy Central The Daily Show
10/25/2023
11:01 PM ET
DESUS NICE: Now if you don't know Mike Johnson, don't worry. Nobody else does. But what they do know is that he wants nationwide limits on abortion. He wants to criminalize gay sex and he even wants to ban Reggaton. Alright, I'm lying on the last one but that seems like his vibe because he comes off as a dick and the one thing that people know about this dude, he was one of the main guys trying to steal the election for Donald Trump.
***
NBC The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon
10/25/2023
11:36 PM ET
JIMMY FALLON: That's right, the new Speaker of the House is Mike Johnson and if that name sounds familiar, it's because it's on every fake ID. "Hi, I'm Mike Johnson. Just two four packs of Mike's Hard Lemonade." I read that Johnson is the most inexperienced house speaker in modern history and a lot of people said that his resume is lacking. And then George Santos is, like, "I can help you edit that. Just say that you were president. Yeah, just say you were the president for four years. Who cares?” Johnson is pretty controversial because he led the effort to overturn the 2020 presidential election so basically, whether or not he won today, he was going to say he did.
