Over the course of chronicling the incestuous (and opaque) relationship between Hillary Clinton and Univision, its news division’s insanely biased coverage of conservatives, its ongoing campaign of vitiation of conservative Hispanics, and its overall leftward biases, I’ve come to the following realization: it may well be an exercise in madness to continue to treat Univision’s news division as an actual news division.
The network’s coverage of the 2016 presidential campaign has devolved into something much more proximate to its core product: the telenovela, an abbreviated soap opera. I learned most of what I now know about narrative deconstruction as a wee lad - in close proximity to my mom while she watched telenovelas, this classic staple of Hispanic TV programming.
The formula for telenovelas includes several basic narrative elements. You have heroes and villains, infidelities, some sort of moral authority figure who also serves as a narrative guide (usually a priest), a big secret and a struggle for control of either a corporation or an inheritance. These basic elements have been in place through the decades-long history of the telenovela, and once you learn how to spot them, it’s like decoding the Matrix.
Univision’s coverage of Hillary Clinton thus becomes more palatable when viewed as a telenovela.
“La Patrona” is an epic tale, a love story for the ages. Witness our Heroine as she overcomes her past (flip-flops) and braves the present (scandals)! Be scintillated as she battles evil (conservatives) who want to steal her birthright (the Hispanic Vote)! Listen to the voice of moral clarity (Jorge Ramos) as he guides your understanding of our heroine’s journey of self-discovery and general obstacle-overcoming, which will end when, at long last, our brave Hillaría is reunited with the love of her life (the Oval Office). Roll credits, play theme song. THE END.
All that’s missing is for the Big Dog himself to roll this one out when he appears during the week ahead at the network’s annual upfronts. Make no mistake; this is the story that will continue to be shoved down Hispanics’ throats over the course of the next year-plus, with no mention of such inconveniences as the relationship between Executive Chairman Haim Saban and the Clinton Foundation. These inconveniences do not aid the telenovela, and are not best for business.
If this indeed is the telenovela that’s in store, more than ever it is going to be up to conservatives to engage the Hispanic community directly, so that they may have what legendary radio commentator Paul Harvey famously called the rest of the story. Fair warning.
