“Better late than never” is apparently the new motto of Stephen Colbert, Comedy Central's faux conservative, who said on Wednesday night's edition of The Colbert Report that one new member of the Republican “farm team” has claimed that Barack Obama is allegedly possessed by a demon even though he performed an exorcism to try and "drive out the evil spirit."
The host's target was Gordon Klingenschmitt, a former Navy chaplain and host of an online religious program carried by YouTube who received 70 percent of the votes cast in last week's midterm election and will soon become a member of the Colorado legislature.
After acknowledging that it is crucial for political parties to have “farm teams” to help candidates reach the national stage, Colbert stated:
Remember, just two years before he ran for president, Barack Obama was an Illinois state senator. Who could have imagined that today, he'd be in the White House, wishing he was an Illinois state senator?
The comedian then stated he would profile one of these “pre-heroes” in a segment he dubbed “Mr. Smith Goes to the State Legislature, Then Later Possibly Washington.”
“My new fave rave is Colorado legislator Gordon Klingenschmitt,” Colbert began. “I assume his father was a 'Schmitt' and his mother a Klingon.”
The host then stated that the Republican candidate campaigned with a very simple message demonstrated in one of his commercials: “Why am I holding this pitchfork? I want this to be a symbol of the positive campaign that I am running.”
“Yes, it is reminiscent of the positive campaign the villagers ran to elect Frankenstein,” Colbert joked, “but Klingenschmitt's campaign stands for so much more. He's the head of the Pray in Jesus Name Project.”
Of course, that organization is one of many “designated as an anti-LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender) hate group by the Southern Poverty Law Center, but Klingenschmitt doesn't hate the gays," the host teased. “He's just concerned for them” as he has demonstrated on his YouTube program:
The demonic spirits inside the homosexual agenda, they're trying to redefine family and homosexualize and recruit your children. Neither the effeminate nor the homosexuals will inherit the kingdom of God (1 Corinthians 9-11, New American Standard Bible).
Jesus, if he were providing marriage counseling to two gay men who were married, Jesus would command them to get divorced.
“Yes, if Jesus were their marriage counselor,” Colbert mocked, “he'd take 65 minutes to do it so he could charge them for the second hour.”
“But folks, you know it's not just the gays,” the host continued. “Everyone needs a little Klingenschmitt exorcism.”
“I have a solution” to the world's problems, the former chaplain noted in another video clip. “Let's do an exorcism and cast the devil out.”
“Father in heaven,” he said, “we pray against the domestic enemies of the Constitution, against this demon of tyranny who is using the White House occupant, that demonic spirit is oppressing us. Father, we command it to leave. We pray that you will help the president repent.”
When the video returned to Colbert sitting at his desk, behind him was a picture of Obama with large red devil horns.
“Yes, Obama is possessed by a demon, and he won't even show us the demon's birth certificate,” he stated.
“Now saying the president is possessed by a demon could be seen as a tad inflammatory,” Colbert added, “but after he was elected, Klingenschmitt told a Colorado newspaper: 'I would say it is time for people of good will on both sides of the political debate to come together to have reasonable discussions about these issues.'”
“Yes, now that the bruising campaign is over, Democrats should join Klingenschmitt in a reasonable discussion about whether or not Barack Obama is possessed by a demon,” Colbert noted. “You can express your point of view that he is not, and Klingenschmitt can express his point of view that a demon made you think that.”
The host began the segment by stating:
The good news from the midterms just keeps coming. Last night, the AP called another Senate race. Alaska has turned red or, maybe thanks to climate change, that might just be the temperature up there now.
Of course, analyzing the midterms is like peeling back the layers of an onion in that the deeper you go, the more the Democrats cry.
It's interesting that the Comedy Central host waited for more than a week after the midterms to attack the religious Republican. One of the Democrats' favorite tricks is to produce an “October Surprise,” and Colbert might have had an impact on the election if he had derided Klingenschmitt before November 4.
