Things got messy on NBC’s Saturday Night Live as they demonstrated that BuzzFeed’s salacious claims of Russian blackmail were a hit piece against the President-elect. The show’s cold open was a recreation of Trump’s press conference from earlier in the week, with fake reporters asking ridiculous questions such as: “I would like to ask you about your big Russian pee pee party.” And it only went downhill from there as they took up Democratic Party talking points and targeted Kellyanne Conway’s looks.
“I would like to start by answering the question that's on everyone's mind. Yes, this is real life. This is really happening,” joked Alec Baldwin, as Donald Trump, to start the skit, “On January 20, I, Donald J. Trump, will become the 45th president of the United States. And then two months later Mike Pence will become the 46th.”
The first question came from a mock ABC News reporter who wanted to know about Trump’s “big Russian pee pee party.” To which Baldwin replied, “No, no I'm not talking about the pee pee because it didn't happen and it wasn't as cool as it sounds.” SNL’s childish potty humor didn’t stop there as they had another giggling reporter ask, “Did you guys like all pee or did you like just watch them pee?”
As the press conference went on, they regurgitated the Democratic Party line that the GOP was going to kill people by giving them no health insurance options after they repeal ObamaCare. Baldwin’s only retort was, “Listen, sweetheart, I'm about to be president. We're all going to die.”
They rewrote the drama of CNN’s Jim Acosta yelling at the president-elect, and over a colleague, to be called on. After the actor calmly stated he was with CNN Baldwin snapped, saying, “No, not CNN either. You are overrated. You’re fake news. I tried to watch your network last night and there was some crazy blond woman spouting lies.” The actor said he was talking about Kellyanne Conway. “Oh, right. God, I love Kellyanne,” Baldwin said, “Everyday it looks like she does the ice bucket challenge with her makeup.”
The final part of the cold open pushed the debunked claim that Russia hacked voting machines with someone demanding the president-elect “do it, say ‘Russia hacked the election.’” After the reporter wore Baldwin down, he admitted that it happened. A Vladimir Putin character wanted to know it he was “really, really sure,” while brandishing a VHS tape labeled “Pee Pee Tape.”
Ironically it was NBC’s investigative correspondent Cynthia McFadden who reported that the intelligence community regarded the claims released by BuzzFeed as Russian “misinformation.” SNL’s eagerness to smear Trump with a “big Russian pee pee party” proved MSNBC’s Chris Matthews comments on BuzzFeed correct, when he argued the release was for the enjoyment if Trump’s enemies.
Transcript below:
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NBC
Saturday Night Live
January 14, 2017
11:30:00 PM EasternDONALD TRUMP [Alec Baldwin]: Hello. Hello, thank you for coming. I would like to start by answering the question, that's on everyone's mind. Yes, this is real life. This is really happening. On January 20, I, Donald J. Trump, will become the 45th president of the United States. And then two months later Mike Pence will become the 46th.
…
ABC REPORTER: ABC News, I would like to ask you about your big Russian pee pee party.
TRUMP: No, no I'm not talking about the pee pee because it didn't happen and it wasn't as cool as it sounds. Next question.
UNIDENTIFIED: Justice Scalia's death has left a vacancy on the Supreme Court, and many are wondering about your timeline for replacement. So, I guess my question is: Did you guys like all pee or did you like just watch them pee?
TRUMP: Guys! Guys no, I do not want to talk about the pee pee. I want to talk about what is really important, which is jobs. Ok, because I am going to bring back a thick stream of jobs back to this country. The biggest, strongest, steadiest stream you've ever seen. This country will be literally showered with jobs. Because I am a major wiz at jobs. This will be a golden opportunity for me as president to make a big splash. Now how’s with me? I know you're in. How about you? You're in? You're in? You're in? Okay.
…
TRUMP: Listen, sweetheart, I'm about to be president. We're all going to die. Next question.
…
TRUMP: God, I'm loving this press conference. I love the press. I respect the press. Let's take another question from the press.
BUZZFEED REPORTER: Yeah, I'm from BuzzFeed.
TRUMP: No, no, no, no, no! Not you Buzzfeed. You are a failing pile of garbage, and you want to know why? Because I took your quiz yesterday. And I’ll tell you right now, I'm not a Joey, I'm a Rachel. Who else has a question? I love the press.
JIM ACOSTA: Jim Acosta, CNN.
TRUMP: No, not CNN either. You are overrated. You’re fake news. I tried to watch your network last night and there was some crazy blond woman spouting lies.
COSTA: That was Kellyanne Conway.
TRUMP: Oh, right. God, I love Kellyanne. Everyday it looks like she does the ice bucket challenge with her makeup. Next question.
…
UNIDENTIFIED: Hello, Mr. Trump. The intelligence community has said definitively that Russia hacked the election. Why won't you say on the record that you agree with them?
TRUMP: I will, I'm happy to say that.
UNIDENTIFIED: Then do it, Say Russia hacked the election.
TRUMP: [Mumbles into mic]
UNIDENTIFIED: I couldn't hear you.
TRUMP: [Mumbles into mic]
UNIDENTIFIED: A little louder, please.
TRUMP: Ok, fine. Russia hacked the election. Are you happy, mom? Next question. You, sir.
VLADIMIR PUTIN: Yes, hello. I am American journalist Wolf Blitzer. Are you sure Russia was behind hacking?
TRUMP: I mean, maybe.
PUTIN: But are you really, really sure? [Holds up vhs tape labeled “Pee Pee Tape”]
TRUMP: It was China. I mean, Canada. It was Meryl Streep. Okay. This press conference is over. Thank you all for peeing here, I mean for pissing here, I mean for being here.
