Gutfeld Slams Carrey and Biggs: 'America Is Great Because Washed Up Comics Have the Right to Suck'

March 30th, 2013 11:17 AM

While Jim Carrey was calling gun owners "motherf--kers," Jason Biggs spent Holy Week attacking the Pope.

The Five's Greg Gutfeld took them both on Friday marvelously saying, "Our country is great because washed up comics have the right to suck" (video follows with transcript and commentary):

GREG GUTFELD: So the Jim Carrey gun control video wasn't really about the Second Amendment. It was about Jim Carrey, a waning star, embracing sanctioned targets to create the false front of intelligence. Sort of like America's drone program.

So, it's fitting we began this Holy Week with Carrey ridiculing the late Charlton Heston and now end with Jason Biggs tweeting predictable jokes about the Pope. There were three, trust me, they are forgettable, as is Jason.

But Pope jokes are as old as the Pope, and by all means you should make them. That's why our country is great because washed up comics have the right to suck.

Based on that, Jason and Carrey are civil rights pioneers. They're the Jackie Robinsons of sucking.

I love the First Amendment and Twitter especially for it exposes the soft underbelly of the celebrity simple mind. They undo everything their publicists try to mask. The mystery is replaced by the moronic.

But really, Jimmy and Jason, if you want to create the illusion of edge, at least take a risk. Stop choosing targets approved by your sheep-like peers. The only people you're impressing are those paid to pretend you're funny, i.e., your dates and your agents. Which is why Jason thinks it's cool to hit the Pope and lacks the beans to do the same to Muhammad. It's why Jimmy attacks gun owners, but not gang bangers. And it's why Jimmy mocked Mr. Heston but won't respond to me, yet.

I guess Jimmy thought he couldn't lose a debate to a dead man. That's what's really funny, he did. And now, Charlton Heston has a brighter future in films than Jim Carrey.

BOB BECKEL: Don't, do not sell yourself short here. You got to him.

GUTFELD: I know. This guy -- this is -- he issued a press release which is basically a complete meltdown. This is what I love about this.

Let me read one sentence that we have up here and then I'll get to the funny parts. "I'll just say this, in my opinion, F news," I won't say what it is, "is the last resort for kinda-sorta-almost-journalists whose options have been severely limited by their extreme and intolerant views."

Now, let me explain about extreme and intolerant. This is a guy that insulted most of America and danced on the grave of Charlton Heston.

He -- Jim Carrey is threatening in this letter, threatening legal action, something Charlton Heston can't do because Charlton Heston is dead. That was the whole point. To stand up for somebody who couldn't talk back to a fool like Jim Carrey.

He first tweeted about this on Monday. Basically what he said is that all gun owners are -- I can't say the word.

DANA PERINO: MF.

GUTFELD: MF. And then he released this video, and then he retreated. When you try -- he wouldn't respond. He hid like a little baby. I love it.


For the record, here's the statement Carrey released Friday:

Since I released my "Cold Dead Hand" video on Funny or Die this week, I have watched Fux News rant, rave, bare its fangs and viciously slander me because of my stand against large magazines and assault rifles. I would take them to task legally if I felt they were worth my time or that anyone with a brain in their head could actually fall for such irresponsible buffoonery. That would gain them far too much attention which is all they really care about.

I'll just say this: in my opinion Fux News is a last resort for kinda-sorta-almost-journalists whose options have been severely limited by their extreme and intolerant views; a media colostomy bag that has begun to burst at the seams and should be emptied before it becomes a public health issue.

I sincerely believe that in time, good people will lose patience with the petty and poisonous behavior of these bullies and Fux News will be remembered as nothing more than a giant culture fart that no amount of Garlique could cure.

I wish them all the luck that accompanies such malevolence.

Clever, isn't it? Speaking of clever, here's what Biggs tweeted Thursday:

As Gutfeld said, our country is great because - well, you know.