The late night comedy shows may be on strike, which means they’ve had to go four months without offering up their hot takes on the news which they sought the remedy on the Thursday’s edition of their Strike Force Five podcast. When asked which news story he regrets not being able to cover, ABC’s Jimmy Kimmel naturally chose Donald Trump.
CBS’s Stephen Colbert opened up the discussion, “We’re going talk about—what are the stories that have been in the conversation of our nation since May 2 when the strike began that you—what—the moment that when you saw it went “okay, I really wish I was on the air” just to talk about that. I’ve got one in mind, [HBO’s John] Oliver knows what it is, so he’s not going to take it. What is the story?”
Doing his best Colbert impression, Kimmel picked Trump without actually mentioning Trump’s name, “: Well, for me, it’s 215 pounds… I mean, you know, that was a great moment.”
NBC’s Seth Meyers then jumped into prove there is not a lot of substantive difference between what passes for late night comedy and establishment media when he sarcastically claimed that means Trump has a “football body.”
Colbert also got in on the sarcasm, “Sure. Muhammad Ali was 6’2”, 215 I think,” as did Kimmel, “Well, they’re practically the same guy. I mean, just, I mean, from a physical standpoint, like, you might think one was the other if you didn’t know Ali had passed away.”
Oliver found it “amazing we’ve missed three Trump indictments. There’s three indictments, you’ve got Giuliani getting charged.”
Meyers would then correct Oliver, pointing there’s been four indictments, but that they were on the air for the Alvin Bragg one. During that first indictment, Colbert responded by eating ice cream out of a baseball helmet and Kimmel, ironically, looked forward to the future indictments meaning that when the strike does end, they will probably return with balloons and confetti for a belated celebration what they consider to be their Super Bowl.
As for the rest of the cast, Oliver lamented he wasn’t on the air to talk about burglar turned chef turned warlord and war criminal turned failed Russian mutineer turned suspiciously-timed plane crash victim Yevgeny Prigozhin and Colbert chose the Somali sprinter scandal.
Here is a transcript for the September 7 podcast:
Strike Force Five
9/7/2023
STEPHEN COLBERT: We’re going talk about—what are the stories that have been in the conversation of our nation since May 2 when the strike began that you—what—the moment that when you saw it went “okay, I really wish I was on the air” just to talk about that. I’ve got one in mind, Oliver knows what it is, so he’s not going to take it. What is the story?
JIMMY KIMMEL: Well, for me, it’s 215 pounds.
COLBERT: Sure. Sure.
KIMMEL: I mean, you know, that was a great moment—
COLBERT: 6’3”, 215 pounds.
SETH MEYERS: Football body.
COLBERT: Sure. Muhammad Ali was 6’2”, 215 I think.
KIMMEL: Well, they’re practically the same guy. I mean, just, I mean, from a physical standpoint, like, you might think one was the other if you didn’t know Ali had passed away.
MEYERS: Equally poetic.
COLBERT: Anyone here 215?
JOHN OLIVER: It is amazing we’ve missed three Trump indictments.
COLBERT: Yeah.
OLIVER: There’s three indictments, you’ve got—
COLBERT: Four.
OLIVER: Giuliani getting charged—
MEYERS: We’ve missed three, we were on for one.
COLBERT: Which was that? Oh, Alvin Bragg.
MEYERS: The first one, the New York one with Alvin Bragg. Yeah. Then we missed—
OLIVER: We missed an entire—
COLBERT: That’s Saint Joseph’s baby indictment.
OLIVER: We missed an entire Russian coup attempt.
