Sharpton Mocks Trump: Maybe They Can Match Your Prison Jumpsuit with Your Spray Tan

December 20th, 2020 10:46 AM

On his Saturday night MSNBC show Politics Nation, the Reverend Al Sharpton trolled President Trump about his post-presidency plans, ending with a joke about how he's headed for prison. He doesn't have the humility to wonder about where he could have gone for all his tax evasion. Pretty much the last guy to mock someone else as a lying New York huckster is Al Sharpton.

Sharpton ran a clip of Trump joking in October that if he lost to the worst candidate ever, he might have to leave the country. Sharpton cracked: "Leaving the country may seem like a good idea, but your coronavirus incompetence means fully two-thirds of the countries on this planet are currently not accepting American travelers, and that's before you subtract the ones you have personally insulted by bad-mouthing their leaders are calling some of them s-hole countries." Then Sharpton pondered all the places Trump might want to go:

SHARPTON: So let's see if we can find an overseas option. You could head to the U.K., but be prepared to face protests and merciless mockery there, just like you've seen during every trip since your election. And this time you won't have the presidency to insulate you.

Perhaps you could establish residency in North Korea with your good friend, Kim Jong-un. But you'd have to give up your addiction to McDonald's. The golden arches don't shine under military dictatorship.

But they do have Mickey D's in Brazil, and you've expressed kinship with Brazil's strongman leader in the past. But since he's already congratulated Biden on his win, that's probably not somewhere you'd like to be.

Even Russia's Vladimir Putin has acknowledged Biden as the winner. All those years of ignoring Russian malfeasance, and your pal Vladimir turned on you quickly.

Maybe you can find welcome in Saudi Arabia. You bragged about protecting crown prince Mohammed bin Salman after his lackeys dismembered a journalist with a bone saw. Just be careful what you say or tweet over there. You know what they do to those who speak their minds.

On balance, it's probably safest for you to stay in the United States for the foreseeable future, even if you are facing unpardonable legalities and those liabilities across multiple jurisdictions. After all, even in the worst-case scenario you'll always have the opportunity to move from one public housing location, the White House, to another, prison. Maybe they can get you a jumpsuit to match your spray tan. We'll be right back.