ABC welcomed actor Alan Cumming to guest host one episode of Jimmy Kimmel Live! on Monday, but even that was one episode too many. Cumming decided to unwittingly prove why late night is dying when he claimed the U.S. has brought back concentration camps and that in the Trump Era, trans people are real-life superheroes while suggesting women who object to the loss of their female-only spaces are being unreasonable.
For Cumming, words aren’t things with definitions to be used to accurately describe a situation but are to be used to inflame people in order to advance an agenda, “America, how are you doing? No, really, how are you doing? I mean, how are you doing aside from being a country that has just reintroduced concentration camps, taken healthcare away from 17 million people to give billionaires a tax cut, and also to finance an armed militia of masked men that commits heinous assorted kidnapping and crimes against humanity on a daily basis? Aside from all that, are you okay? I wouldn’t have thought so.”
Later in his monologue, he added, “But don’t worry, according to ICE, I'm one of the good ones, and I am very proud to be from Scotland. We've given the world so much: the bicycle, the telephone, penicillin, television, for goodness sakes. We are also responsible for half of the current president, as sadly Donald Trump's mother was Scottish. And that's probably why as a nation we drink so much.”
He then moved on to his call to action:
Now, tonight's show is all about superheroes. Not only are the Fantastic Four here, as I said. Some of you may remember me as Nightcrawler from the X-Men franchise. Of course, these superhero movies are only pretend, but I happen to believe that there are actual superheroes in real life who walk among us, and these superheroes are called trans people. Because just like superheroes, trans people are born with something special and magical about them, and they often have to hide what's special and magical about them from other people. Like superheroes, they grow up in a society that doesn't understand them, that makes them the other and often hates them.
Cumming also claimed that “Like superheroes, evil billionaires want to get rid of trans people for no [bleep] reason whatsoever. And just like superheroes, trans people are not new. They've been around forever, and they're not going anywhere, no matter how much this administration tries to make you fear them.”
After a brief “but Trump” bit of argumentation, Cumming declared, “Millions of Americans are obsessed with this idea that trans people are attacking women in bathrooms. You know what trans people do in the bathroom? They poop and they pee, and I'm sure they always wash their hands afterwards. And why on Earth—this is what gets me—why on Earth would a rapist go to the bother of pretending to be trans in a country that actually treats rapists better than trans people.”
Towards the end of his speech, Cumming tried to cite Jesus as his political ally: “Even as an atheist, I am a big fan of Jesus, I really am. I mean, what's not to like? A tall, gorgeous man with great abs and flowing hair, getting his feet washed by prostitutes, and encouraging people to love their neighbors all the while slaying in a loose caftan. And Jesus was an immigrant, by the way, let's not forget.”
He continued, “Jesus would have loved trans people. He changed water into wine! Is that not itself an act of transition? And you know how I know Jesus would've loved trans people? Because he loved people. He loved all people. And so of course he would love trans people and all queer people. I mean, Jesus was followed around at all times by 12 hot single guys, all of them also sporting caftans.”
Finally, Cumming lamented that, “Our government has legislated that trans people do not exist. It is trying to erase them completely. Imagine having to stockpile your essential, life-saving medicine because your president might cut off access to it for no other reason than it makes him look strong to his base.”
Part of the reason why late night is dying is because of statements like that. Not only is there no comedy in saying Republicans are killing people, but it also shows a complete lack of willingness to understand what conservatives actually believe. Conservatives can give detailed arguments about biological reality versus subjective feelings or the right of women to feel secure in their own public restrooms or to have their own athletic competitions, but Cumming doesn’t feel like he needs to engage in any of that. He can just mock conservatives and claim Trump wants to appear like a tough guy. Meanwhile, the audience size shrinks.
Here is a transcript for the July 21 show:
ABC Jimmy Kimmel Live!
7/21/2025
11:36 PM ET
ALAN CUMMING: Now, anyway, America, how are you doing? No, really, how are you doing? I mean how, are you doing aside from being a country that has just reintroduced concentration camps, taken healthcare away from 17 million people to give billionaires a tax cut, and also to finance an armed militia of masked men that commits heinous assorted kidnapping and crimes against humanity on a daily basis? Aside from all that, are you okay? I wouldn’t have thought so.
…
But don’t worry, according to ICE, I'm one of the good ones, and I am very proud to be from Scotland. We've given the world so much: the bicycle, the telephone, penicillin, television, for goodness sakes. We are also responsible for half of the current president, as sadly Donald Trump's mother was Scottish. And that's probably why as a nation we drink so much. Cheers!
Now, tonight's show is all about superheroes. Not only are the Fantastic Four here, as I said. Some of you may remember me as Nightcrawler from the X-Men franchise. Of course, these superhero movies are only pretend, but I happen to believe that there are actual superheroes in real life who walk among us, and these superheroes are called trans people. Because just like superheroes, trans people are born with something special and magical about them, and they often have to hide what's special and magical about them from other people. Like superheroes, they grow up in a society that doesn't understand them, that makes them the other and often hates them.
Like superheroes, trans people just want the world to be a safer place, and they believe we should protect each other, and live our lives in peace.
Like superheroes, evil billionaires want to get rid of trans people for no [bleep] reason whatsoever. And just like superheroes, trans people are not new. They've been around forever, and they're not going anywhere, no matter how much this administration tries to make you fear them.
There is no evidence that trans people are a threat to women. There is, however, ample evidence that the president of the United States publicly brags about barging into beauty pageant dressing rooms and grabbing women by their [bleep]. Wake up, America!
Come on! Millions, millions of Americans are obsessed with this idea that trans people are attacking women in bathrooms. You know what trans people do in the bathroom? They poop and they pee, and I'm sure they always wash their hands afterwards. And why on Earth — this is what gets me — why on Earth would a rapist go to the bother of pretending to be trans in a country that actually treats rapists better than trans people.
…
And talking of Jesus, even as an atheist, I am a big fan of Jesus, I really am. I mean, what's not to like? A tall, gorgeous man with great abs and flowing hair, getting his feet washed by prostitutes, and encouraging people to love their neighbors all the while slaying in a loose caftan. And Jesus was an immigrant, by the way, let's not forget.
Jesus, Jesus would have loved trans people. He changed water into wine! Is that not itself an act of transition? And you know how I know Jesus would've loved trans people? Because he loved people. He loved all people. And so of course he would love trans people and all queer people. I mean, Jesus was followed around at all times by 12 hot single guys, all of them also sporting caftans.
You do the math! Jesus loved the gays, America! Deal with it! The only thing our current president has in common with Jesus is that they both owe their careers to their dads. Thank you! But seriously, just take a moment to imagine what it must feel like to be a trans person in America today. Our government has legislated that trans people do not exist. It is trying to erase them completely. Imagine having to stockpile your essential, life-saving medicine because your president might cut off access to it for no other reason than it makes him look strong to his base.
