Then They Came for Poirot: Agatha Christie Censored

March 27th, 2023 10:38 AM

The infantilization of Western culture proceeds apace. Word comes from the Daily Telegraph, via Deadline, that Agatha Christie is joining Roald Dahl, Ian Fleming and other literary miscreants in being censored by their current publishers.

And it’s probably for the best. Admittedly, there’s little chance our young Taliban would be reading hundred year-old murder mysteries. But imagine the social emergency that would ensue should some sociology major at Forgettable U. begin idly thumbing through Murder on the Orient Express only to realize it was not written with her exquisitely honed sensitivity in mind. Do you want to risk drama? Didn’t think so.

So Harper Collins has sent Poirot and Miss Marple to the re-education camp, there to unlearn reactionary words and habits of speech:  

For example, in the book Death on the Nile – published in 1937 and recently remade for the big screen by Kenneth Branagh – references to “Nubian people” have been removed, as have several references to non-British characters’ physiques. The word “local” replaces “native.”

A line in Christie’s debut novel The Mysterious Affair at Styles which has Poirot commenting on a character being “a Jew” has gone.

Presumably it’s been replaced with something less controversial, like “Zionist occupier.” The Telegraph said “descriptions, insults or references to ethnicity, particularly for characters Christie’s protagonists encounter outside the UK.” Words like "Gypsy," "Oriental," and "Nubian" are out. The native stevedores become “indigenous logistical experts.”  

Just kidding about that last one. Or am I?