Mental 12-year old Jimmy Kimmel hypes a new penile implant by claiming, "Erections, as many of you know, are not guaranteed. They can be elusive, and that's why so many men with soft in their pants are celebrating this exciting new development" and then playing a video of JD… https://t.co/vuverqrBng https://t.co/6auxAiKOCm

Behar boasts that Swisher wants "to buy the paper out from under" Bezos. Despite not having the money, Swisher claims she can get it whenever she wants from billionaire friends. Whoopi suggests "crowdfunding" the purchase and if not, "maybe it's time for a new newspaper." https://t.co/jb26cVJOHB

Whoopi also falsely claims they don't get personal and they don't do name calling. Whoopi refuses to call Trump by his name, only calling him "you know who." Behar mocked Musk's 4-y/o son for his name and accused Musk of being a criminal without evidence. https://t.co/fM7V86egXu

Stephen Colbert also freaks "So he is gonna arrest anyone who disagrees with him? Even me? John Oliver?...Whether or not you agree with this protestor and what he did or if you disagree with this protestor and what he did, if you think this kind of thing will end with students,… https://t.co/aeTSev9iZw https://t.co/dKpkZ7LSOX

Seth Meyers claims arresting Mahmoud Khalil for leading Hamas protests is "a grotesque and abhorrent abuse of power. Naked authoritarianism. You can't arrest and deport someone for speech you don't like, especially if they haven't been charged with a crime." (1/2) https://t.co/Ns2DM2bmq6

Joan Baez on Wed night debut of #EverybodysLive with John Mulaney on @Netflix: “We’re all here to be silly and have fun and as long as we recognize the fact that our democracy’s going up in flames and we’re being run by a bunch of really incompetent billionaires.” https://t.co/MCyjpNoyGo

Reporter: Ireland is known for very happy, fun-loving people... Why in the world would you let Rosie O'Donnell move to Ireland? Trump: I like that question, do you know you have Rosie O'Donnell, do you know who she is? Irish PM: ... Trump: You're better off not knowing. https://t.co/2WuhmPZ1hv

PBS's Laura Barron-Lopez tells CNN that Trump's desire to downsize or get rid of the Education Department are part of a trend "to turn to private corporations...And yes, the vast majority of that is decided by state and local governments, but they see the federal government doing… https://t.co/sisfxifO9I https://t.co/onb6ed6p7H

“No Trump, no KKK, no fascists in the USA!” At “Save Our Healthcare Rally” near U.S. Capitol. https://t.co/vM2yzhQf5q

Multi-millionaire ABC co-host Sunny Hostin comes out with the Marxist hot take: "We need to start talking about the 1% of billionaires that are privatizing our country, privatizing our government, and stealing our money from us! That's what we need to focus on!" https://t.co/AJocNtOcbu

Whoopi claims if Trump actually "cared about the economy," he would be making "commercials" for Social Security and "for the people who work for the government." https://t.co/mZqjLp0B6G

Ignoring Biden trying to EV cars and trucks (while snubbing Tesla), The View mocks Trump pitching Teslas with a mocking sales jingle. Whoopi scoffs at Trump through asking: "Why would he even think that voters would want to see him go to bat, when the economy is being tanked by… https://t.co/QkzdLyf8Fk https://t.co/tXNed57Pji

Later, New York Times columnist Ezra Klein alleges a conspiracy, "It's not that they are just trying to make it not work, right? If Elon Musk was just trying to make government fail, that's one thing. They are trying to break it so they can take it over." Colbert replies "Very… https://t.co/GJNs165GjJ https://t.co/PAuPFb3938

Stephen Colbert asks actor Nathan Lane "What do you make of what he's [Trump] doing in terms of what it means for culture?" Lane claims "I don't want to be a downer but I think from a historical context we are totally [bleep]. I mean, you know, The Kennedy Center, he just… https://t.co/OKXfq9f1qZ https://t.co/YGY7wBWFnI

CNN cuts to a media gaggle at the White House, but after it becomes clear Elon Musk was talking about how Teslas were "the most American made" on the market, CNN cuts away with host Boris Sanchez scoffing at Tesla and their stock price. https://t.co/DpNMhw15l5

.@PressSec @KarolineLeavitt praises The Washington Post’s leadership for the changes made by owner Jeff Bezos, which has triggered a liberal exodus: “I would like to commend the Washington Post, who I believe is in the room today. According to a new report from Axios, The… https://t.co/WRCdBZup4F https://t.co/z5qm1Kq5qR

PBS's William Brangham says the "administration has not provided any details alleging that he [Columbia student Mahmoud Khalil] has said or done any of those things," such as being pro-terrorist, anti-Semitic, and anti-American. Of course, Brangham omits his group Columbia… https://t.co/d6Nv9aDAkv https://t.co/JJP95A4375

Dem Senator Elissa Slotkin (MI) says that by electing Trump, America is acting like petulant and "angry" "teenager" without a "fully form[ed] brain": "What do you do when you have a teenager threatening themselves and others, you just try to get them through this period alive.… https://t.co/niohNDNFrL https://t.co/7EN0xLkt7A

John Oliver isn't happy about "centrist Democrats'" alleged "current insistence on bending over backwards to cater to conservatives" including Elissa Slotkin, "she criticized Trump by praising Reagan. And I'll admit there are positive things you can say about Reagan, like...'He's… https://t.co/GN2pK4qoO8 https://t.co/7qkLTPSrbJ

Liberal Media Scream: Sunny Hostin tells Democrats to fight like crazy Al Green or ‘people will die’ @BrentHBaker @theMRC 'Hostin is advocating more coarseness in politics. And ABC News is sanctioning it' https://t.co/whY9rY4dfa via @dcexaminer https://t.co/6L9FxLeUDm