Since his Comedy Central show began back in January, Larry Wilmore has followed the heavily-trod path of his former boss, The Daily Show's Jon Stewart -- he directs 95 percent of his snark at conservatives, the remaining sliver at fellow liberals.
Seeing how Wilmore is so selective in his ridicule toward the left, the outrage in question must be indisputably egregious to draw his fire. Mark Halperin's are-you-truly-Cuban? cross examination of GOP Senator Ted Cruz easily meets that standard.
The scattering of conservatives watching The Nightly Show with Larry Wilmore on Wednesday found they weren't entirely wasting their time --
WILMORE: ... How would a journalist approach this Cuban-American presidential candidate?
HALPERIN: When you filled out your application to Princeton, to Harvard Law School, did you list yourself as an Hispanic?
WILMORE: Hmmm, OK (tilts head back and forth, waves hands to indicate displeasure), maybe a little bit intrusive, but I understand. I mean, this year Jeb Bush said he accidentally listed himself as Hispanic on a voter registration form once. Hmmm, look, I get a joke. Whenever I order tickets for the movies online, I always accidentally push the 11 years old button, always happens. It's an accident. They keep saving me $14, I don't know how that happens! Anyhow, the interview continues --
HALPERIN (sternly): You got a favorite Cuban food, a Cuban dish?
CRUZ: Oh, I grew up eating Cuban food all the time. My grandparents ...
HALPERIN (interrupting): What's your favorite dish?
WILMORE (mimicking Halperin's brusque manner): What's your favorite dish? No, man, no, no -- I don't believe you're Cuban! Prove it to me by saying what your favorite Cuban dish is! Answer me, fake Cuban man!
CRUZ: Uh, you know, picadillo, I grew up eating all the time, we had plantains, we had beans, beans and rice ...
WILMORE (mimicking Halperin, hand held out as if to indicate, enough!, nods head vigorously): Mmm hmm, mmm hmm. Is it beans and rice or rice and beans? Don't f*ck with me! OK, all right, maybe he's just having fun with him. But he's gotta be satisfied with that. I mean, beans and rice sounds super Cuban to me, you know. Or as they say in Havana, soup's cubes. All right, Halperin, you believe he's dey Havana now, right?
HALPERIN: All right, favorite, you got, you like Cuban music, do you have a favorite Cuban singer?
WILMORE: All right, mister, you may have passed my Cuban food test, OK, OK -- but let's see how you do with my Cuban music test, all right?! Because one of us is not leaving this interview until he establishes his level of Cubanity! Now, digame! (Tell me).CRUZ: You know, I have to admit, in that I'm much more of a Texan. I tend to listen to country music more than Cuban music.
WILMORE: strokes chin, mimics Most Interesting Man in the World): Well played, fake Cuban senator Cruz, well played. Sh*t! I've got to do something. Ah! If you're a Cuban, you would have to know Espanol. If only there was some way I could get him to speak some Espanol. I know -- maybe I'll just slip it in at the end of a question to see if he notices. (mock-sinister laugh). That'll trip him up! He'll be none the wiser. Oh, Halperin, stop impressing me.
HALPERIN: All right, finally, we've got one to give you the opportunity to directly welcome your colleague, Senator Sanders, to the race and I'd like you to do it, if you would, en Espanol.
WILMORE (dumbfounded): OK, this is literally turning into a Spanish Inquisition. Literally (laughter and applause from audience). Gah! Seriously! What the f*ck, man!
Side note: Will we ever see a Comedy Central host willing to shed the frequent tiresome F-bombs for cheap laughs? Not in this geological era.
Wilmore, sensing that his like-minded audience suspects he's been overly sympathetic to certifiable thought criminal Ted Cruz, feigns nausea to indicate he's dutifully returned to the liberal bubble --
WILMORE: Something about this just makes me feel a little sick. No, it's not so much that Halperin would stoop to such low journalistic standards, trying to trip up somebody on their ethnic identity card.
"Their ethnic identity card" -- as opposed to, "their ethnic identity." Why the odd inclusion of "card"?
WILMORE: It's just, I don't know how to say this (pause for effect) -- he's actually making me feel sorry for Ted Cruz. (More laughter from Wilmore's relieved audience). I'm OK, I'm OK. I think I just threw up in mi boca. (no translation necessary). .... Halperin actually apologized and Cruz accepted his apology, but I am concerned -- I mean, what if Halperin gets in a room with Ben Carson and asks, OK, if you're so black, Dr. Carson, how do you like your chitlins?!
Same joke from Limbaugh and the libs are burning him in effigy.
Wish I could claim credit for this, but Michelle Malkin beat me to it -- "Where was Self-Appointed Ethnic Authenticity Policeman Mark Halperin to harangue Fauxcahontas Elizabeth Warren?"
