Please Clap: The View Pitches Jokes for Biden, They All CRASH and BURN

April 29th, 2022 3:39 PM

With the White House Correspondents Dinner only a day away, the cast of The View wanted to give President Biden a hand on Friday by pitching him jokes targeting people on the right to roast during his speech. But things didn’t go as they expected as each of the three “jokes” fell flat with an audience that groaned and had to be cued to clap by their guest co-host Jane Lynch.

They led into the segment by questioning if Biden should even deliver jokes since the country was so divided and the world was in turmoil. And after praising former President Obama as “hilarious,” co-host Sunny Hostin looked to comedian and co-host Joy Behar to pitch the jokes written by their “comedy writer” Frank Santa Padre. “Joe, take these. Write it down,” declared co-host Sara Haines.

Behar then delivered this stinker: “Madison Cawthorn wanted to be here, but there was a sale at Victoria's Secret.” You could hear a pin drop as the audience sat there in silence. There were a couple of sparse laughs as the awkwardness of the situation crept in.

Realizing she just bombed, Behar tried to explain “what's wrong with” the joke as co-host Ana Navarro interjected with her own spin on a Cawthorn joke. “Maybe Madison Cawthorn wanted to be here, but he got stopped at the airport trying to bring in a gun for the third time,” she said in a serious tone to an even more awkward silence forms the audience and nervous groans.

 

 

And as with any good joke, Behar proceeded to try to explain why her joke was funny:

BEHAR: And the reason this is funny—

[Crosstalk]

BEHAR: The reason this is funny – but you have to know that he was caught wearing some kind of lady's thing. So you needed to know.

“Give us the next one. Give us the next one,” Haines pleaded to move on:

The next two came in rapid succession as each of them fell flat with a collective “ew” from the audience at the second “joke”:

BEHAR: Okay. Let's try this one. Marjorie Taylor Greene wanted to attend tonight, but her tinfoil hat kept setting off the metal detectors.

[Laughter from the cast, sparse recognition from the audience]

BEHAR: I got another one you’re definitely going to like now. America is facing some dark times, but not as dark as Tucker Carlson's testicles.

[No laughter]

LYNCH: That's good.

[Groans and “ew” from the audience]

Haines chimed in with an “[a]h, there we go” as if collective disgust was the goal. And they had a Jeb Bush “please clap” moment when Lynch looked at the audience and started clapping to cue them to make some noise.

“Okay. So, I would say that Joe Biden should call Frank Santa Padre and he'll write some jokes for him,” Behar said to be nice to their writer. “I think those are appropriate subjects. Those are good,” Lynch added. Behar agreed, citing that the “target[s] are these people that are ridiculous.”

In an attempt to salvage their joke pitches, Hostin suggested Biden lean on “self-deprecating humor as well.” Behar agreed and said he should lean into the Sleepy Joe moniker. “He should just nod off. Like, say, ‘they call me sleepy Joe, I think that’s radicicolous,’” she quipped as she pretended to nod off too.

“Something like that because it’s always funny when you can make fun of yourself,” Hostin again explained the joke.

And before going to a commercial, Navarro seriously argued that “he can spend the entire set making fun of Florida. I mean, Florida’s become so crazy.” “There’s Disney stuff he can do with DeSantis. There’s’ a lot of stuff,” Behar agreed.

There’s a vaudeville hook when you need one?

These unfunny jokes were made possible because of lucrative sponsorships from Disney and Ensure. Their contact information is linked.

The transcript is below, click "expand" to read:

ABC’s The View
April 29, 2022
11:06:56 a.m. Eastern

(…)

SUNNY HOSTIN: Joy, you're a comedian. How would you handle something like this, because it's tough?

JOY BEHAR: It so happens – Thank you for asking. It so happens that we have a comedy writer on staff.

HOSTIN: Okay.

BEHAR: And – Frank Santa Padre, and he has written what I think are three jokes that Joe Biden can use.

HOSTIN: Okay.

BEHAR: Okay. Here's one.

SARA HAINES: Joe, take these. Write it down.

BEHAR: Madison Cawthorn wanted to be here, but there was a sale at Victoria's Secret.

[Mostly silences with groans and sparse laughter from the audience]

No? Okay. I'll tell you what's wrong with --

ANA NAVARRO: Maybe Madison Cawthorn wanted to be here, but he got stopped at the airport trying to bring in a gun for the third time.

[No response from the audience]

BEHAR: No, that’s not as funny as this one.

[Laughter at the awkwardness]

BEHAR: And the reason this is funny—

[Crosstalk]

BEHAR: The reason this is funny – but you have to know that he was caught wearing some kind of lady's thing. So you needed to know.

HAINES: Give us the next one. Give us the next one.

NAVARRO: Let’s move on to number two.

BEHAR: Okay. Let's try this one. Marjorie Taylor Greene wanted to attend tonight, but her tinfoil hat kept setting off the metal detectors.

[Laughter from the cast, sparse recognition from the audience]

BEHAR: I got another one you’re definitely going to like now. America is facing some dark times, but not as dark as Tucker Carlson's testicles.

[No laughter]

JANE LYNCH: That's good.

[Groans and “ew” from the audience]

HAINES: Ah, there we go.

[Lynch ques that audience to clap and they follow]

BEHAR: Okay. So, I would say that Joe Biden should call Frank Santa Padre and he'll write some jokes for him.

LYNCH: I think those are appropriate subjects. Those are good.

BEHAR: What? Because why? Because your target are these people that are ridiculous.

[Crosstalk]

HOSTIN: And self-deprecating humor as well right?

BEHAR: Well, yeah.

HOSTIN: Because he’s been the target of so much I think and—

BEHAR: He should just nod off. Like say, “they call me sleepy Joe, I think that’s radicicolous — [pretends to nod off].

HOSTIN: Something like that because it’s always funny when you can make fun of yourself.

NAVARRO: I think he can spend the entire set making fun of Florida. I mean, Florida’s become so crazy.

BEHAR: Disney. There’s Disney stuff he can do with DeSantis. There’s’ a lot of stuff.

(…)