'Roswell, New Mexico' Indulges in Extraterrestrial Threesome

April 20th, 2020 11:20 PM

The good news is that CW’s Roswell, New Mexico seems to have moved on from talking about abortion. The bad news is that now it seems comfortable showing alien threesomes. Somehow, this was not the step I was hoping this sci-fi series would take.

The April 20 episode “Sex and Candy” follows the culmination of the relationship between alien Michael (Michael Vlamis), his ex-boyfriend Alex (Tyler Blackburn), and their mutual friend Maria (Heather Hemmens). You see, Michael has had a bit of an on-again, off-again romance with both Alex and Maria over the last season and a half. In addition to that, Alex and Maria previously dated in high school before Alex discovered he was gay. Over the past few episodes, tension has built up over what the final endgame would be.

It turns out, however, that he did not have to choose after all. After Alex and Maria are rescued by Michael from a boot maker's delusional brother, the three appear to reconcile their feelings by all consummating their relationships at once. Pretty soon, they're stripping each other’s clothes and passionately kissing before we cut to commercial.

Although we don’t see the actual sex scene (this is still network television after all), this was considered a threesome. Alex himself describes the moment as such, joking, “I mean, if you told me I was gonna have a threesome with my best friend and my first love, I would say, ‘Which circle of hell am I in?’” Despite that joke, he mentions that he felt “loved” in that time, something that he struggled with as a gay man growing up with his homophobic dad. Apparently, our options in love are either accepting threesomes or accepting homophobia.

Meanwhile, here I am asking why we can’t hate both. Besides, it’s not like there aren’t other shows that unfortunately espouse the virtues of interspecies polyamory. For years, liberals have claimed that people who feared gay marriage would lead to accepting polygamy were idiots, yet here we are forced to view polyamory on multiple shows. It wouldn’t be the first time leftists got something terribly wrong.

The continuing relationship between Michael, Alex, and Maria is still up in the air, so we’ll have to see where it goes. Fortunately for us, it can’t get much lower than this.