What do you get when you give C-list celebrities a chance to fawn over their God-like president in front of a camera? You get an embarrassing mess fit for GQ’s Man of the Year recipient, Barrack Obama.
In case you missed it, President Obama was named Man of the Year by GQ and got a big picture on the magazine’s cover. In an effort to push that last bit of air into the man’s already Jupiter-size ego, GQ put together a little video for him. “GQ has assembled an important group of celebrities including Judd Apatow, Stephen Curry, Future, Tracy Morgan, Amy Schumer, O’Shea Jackson Jr., and the cast of Hamilton to thank President Obama for his years of service to the country.”
“Important group of celebrities” is a bit of an overstatement since most of them are hardly recognizable. But they were all kind enough to come together and get their fifteen seconds of fame (it can only help them) and thank our President for all he has done while showering him with some heartfelt gifts.
The rapper named Future gave Obama a liter of Sprite with some Styrofoam cups and a request that he listen to his latest album, DS2 which includes wholesome lyrics such as “I’m fucking with shorty, I’m loving the way that she fucking me yeah Give no fucks yeah,” from the album’s hit song “F*ck Up Some Commas.” (What does it say about current society that this “artist” isn’t embarrassed to ask the leader of the free world to spend time with his dirty nursery rhymes?)
Sarah Palin bashing, f-bomb dropping Seinfeld actress Julia Louis-Dreyfus presented Obama with an elegant oil painting making fun of a disappointed Karl Rove “freaking out” on Fox News after hearing Obama had won Ohio in the elections. “God bless America, and God bless you.” She added. Thanks.
Straight Outta Compton star O’Shea Jackson Jr. gave the Commander-in-Chief “the greatest Raider hat of all time.” Why is it the greatest you ask? Jackson explained the rim is signed by the cast of Straight Outta Compton and the bottom is signed by surviving members of the real N.W.A., the gangsta rap group from Compton and perfect role model for kids everywhere. Why not just give him a Glock and a bag of weed?
Most noteworthy among the cornucopia of praises and gifts, is the gift given by the classless comedian Amy Schumer. Her thanks to the man holding the highest office in our country was a ream of condoms — Magnum, she assumed. Perhaps the only appropriate gift was Tracy Morgan likening Obama to Michael Corleone of The Godfather, “no joke.”
As if the king, err, President’s bloated ego needed more air, his faithful subjects just fall in line to kiss his golf shoes. It’s truly the most tragic of love stories.
