If...could...would.

That pretty much sums up the "scientific" analysis in a Chicago Tribune story warning of the terrible warming the Windy City will be enduring in the not too distant future. Never mind that Chicago has been experiencing much colder than normal weather this year as your humble correspondent noted last June when quoting the WGN Weather Center blog:

The cloudy, chilly and rainy open to June here has been the talk of the town. So far this June is running more than 12 degrees cooler than last year, and the clouds, rain and chilly lake winds have been persistent. The average temperature at O'Hare International Airport through Friday has been only 59.5 degrees: nearly 7 degrees below normal and the coldest since records there began 50 years ago.

However, the weather that is actually occurring in Chicago is completely overlooked in the global warming warning story based on sheer speculation by Jim Tankersley:

If global warming continues unchecked, Chicago would see a repeat of the killer 1995 heat wave every summer by the middle of the century, an environmental group says in a study released Wednesday.

Big if there, Jim. Especially since global warming is hardly continuing unchecked in Chicago. It's more like global cooling in that city but why toss inconvenient facts in your direction when it interferes with the global warming fairy tale:

The report from the Union of Concerned Scientists also predicts that the city's air quality would deteriorate if humans do not scale back greenhouse gas emissions dramatically.

Illinois farmers would suffer from droughts, pests and flooding that would more than outweigh any potential benefits from a longer growing season caused by warmer temperatures. Heat stress in cattle could force the state's dairy industry to migrate north.

"Global warming represents an enormous challenge to Illinois' way of life and its residents' livelihoods," the authors write in conclusion.

Ah yes, the far left Union of Concerned Scientists funded by the equally far left Tides Foundation. Not much of an agenda there, eh? 

Let us now search in vain for even the slightest hint of what the weather Chicago has been experiencing lately in this article:

More than 50 days a year would top 90 degrees in Chicago by mid-century, the report warns, up from a historical average of 15 per year. The city would average a heat wave per year on par with the city's 1995 scorcher, which authorities blamed for hundreds of deaths. Once every five years, the city would endure a heat wave similar to Europe's in 2003, which the authors project would kill more than 1,000 residents.

By century's end, the report projects, every Chicago summer would be hotter than 1983, the hottest summer on record for the city. Illinois' climate would resemble East Texas today, the report says.

Key word here: "would." Note the complete lack of reference to the actual weather Chicago is experiencing.

So give it another try, Jim. And this time you might want to open your window and take note of the weather that is actually occurring in Chicago. Oh, and try to dress warmly when you open that window so you don't get a chill. 

—P.J. Gladnick is a freelance writer and creator of the DUmmie FUnnies blog.