Bozell Column: The Anti-God Book, by 'God'
Those prestigious publishers at Simon & Schuster selected All Saints Day to unleash the book world's latest attempt at mocking Christianity. It’s called "The Last Testament, by God."
The author is David Javerbaum, a top writer for 11 years for "The Daily Show" on Comedy Central, perhaps America's leading religion-hating TV network. Is it any surprise that the critics are loving it?
Publishers Weekly raves, "The Almighty opens up in this blithely blasphemous satire of monotheism." God, in this alleged autobiography, is "a complex, troubled Deity: vain, petulant, desperate for praise and burnt offerings, guiltily pensive in the after-wrath of unhinged smitings. Adherents of every Abrahamic faith will find plenty of hilarious, offensive manna for thought in these revelations." Kirkus Reviews bluntly adds, "Damned comical. Amen."
”Hilarious, offensive.” What they mean is that it’s hilarious because it’s offensive.
Simon & Schuster's Executive Vice President and Publisher Jonathan Karp announced the book by poking fun of the Jews. “We feel like we are the Chosen Publisher,” Karp cracked to Entertainment Weekly. “A lot of writers are creative, but this writer is really creative.”Karp was much more obsequious and reverent last fall in selling the last testament of Ted Kennedy, the posthumous memoir "True Compass." Perhaps it’s because it’s Kennedy, not just God.
Javerbaum’s God is a doofus full of imperfections. In the beginning, God created the world so he could dominate someone. "In my humble opinion, thou canst hardly call thyself the LORD, if thou hast created no other beings to LORD it over," Javerbaum imagines. "I had a burning ambition to rule the world, but I knew such a world was not going to create itself; no fully formed planet was going to suddenly appear and say, `Here, LORD, take these 20 burnt offerings,' or `Here, LORD, take these 50 infidel heads,' or `Here, LORD, take these 200 years of religious warfare.'"
One of "God's" better qualities, apparently, is his strange loathing for the Word of God. The Bible condemns homosexuality, for example, but Javerbaum's God actually created "Adam and Steve" first. He created Adam to tend the Garden of Eden, but then when he grew lonely, "God" made for him "a hunk, unburdened by excess wisdom; ripped, and cut, and hung like unto a fig tree before the harvest; Yea, and a power bottom."
This apparently places the book in the "Humor" section.
In Chapter 14, Javerbaum's God adds the convenient smear that religious traditionalists are all secretly gay. "It is an undeniable fact that those clergymen harshest in their condemnation of gays and lesbians are often those struggling hardest against their own hidden urges; which is why they cannot even preach straight. It was certainly true in regard to the serpent in the Garden; and it has certainly been true of many other `men of God' in all three of my great religions who have spoken out against homosexuality."
Then the smear gets specific. "God" just declares outright that televangelist "Joel Osteen is gay." Our “God” doesn’t actually accuse Osteen of having cheated on his wife of 24 years, Victoria. It’s just that "in the secret recesses of his heart, Joel Osteen yearns for the tender touch of another man. This is subjective, and intangible, and lies beyond the bounds of libel laws." This ersatz Almighty protests that unlike the televangelists, "I am in no way homophobic."
In fact, to promote the book, Javerbaum & Co. created a cartoon "It Getteth Better" video for gay youth in which God denounces conservative priests and other ministers as "wack peeps" and "straight-up haters." He mocks the Bible as filled with stupid passages. He declares, "It's not that ten percent of thee came out defective; it's that I'm ten percent gay. Fifteen percent whenever I see Ryan Reynolds." He concludes "Let me say Amen, or rather Ah, gay men," and then winks.
The last time Javerbaum had this much fun mocking religious people was writing songs for the 2008 Stephen Colbert "Christmas special." He had country singer Toby Keith proclaiming when the War on Christmas ends, liberals are going to be beheaded. Keith sang, "You can call me un-Christian, but that's not true / Buddy, I've got a present for you." Then, the audience saw a house exploding, and Santa and two little kids laughing at the violence.
Once you've mocked Santa Claus as a murderous psycho, taking a whack at God is a no-brainer. Anyone who actually believed in God or the apparently archaic concept of blasphemy wouldn't be so eager to take the Lord's name in vain with such gleeful abandon. Such is the dreadful state of our top publishing houses and television networks.
- Brent Bozell's blog
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Comments
Strange. It is the default
Submitted by ant on Sat, 10/29/2011 - 8:57am.
Strange. It is the default position of the gay community to mock God or deny his existence, this tells me more about them then the simple protests they have with specific Bible passages. Theft is condemned in the Bible as well, but our thieving 'pals' in Washington rarely have the audacity to say the Bible is simply wrong or theftaphobic on the issue. They have other excuses, for now.
I realize this is supposed to be humor, but why would a vain God that wanted throngs of people to lord over create two men that could not re-produce? So much time spent writing about and mocking an 'imaginary invention of man', I've never seen hundreds of pages seeking to debunk the Tooth Fairy.
Not so fast
Submitted by vaboxrboy on Sat, 10/29/2011 - 9:38am.
The gay community doen't mock religion or God as a whole. A lot of us are spiritual. Just like everyone else they are those who believe and those who don't. There is an established gay church, Metropolitan Community Church, and many, many organizations within churches that include the gay community. Please don't make blanket statements about things you know nothing about.
Peace.
Submitted by ant on Sat, 10/29/2011 - 11:09am.
I know they don't. Just as Westboro and other groups aren't representative of the entire community of believers. That doesn't prevent much of the left from making blanket condemnations of Christians though, does it? I have to assume you know what I mean when an article is specifically about the mockery, plus it helps to keep a post succinct when it doesn't have to be full of disclaimers and overly-defensive explanations. I'm not trying to write a novelette here.
Ant
Submitted by shawn. on Sat, 10/29/2011 - 11:17am.
Looks like you have had a tough crowd the past few days ;-)
You don't know the half of
Submitted by ant on Sat, 10/29/2011 - 11:32am.
You don't know the half of it, my friend. But, hey, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, right?
P.S. Maybe it's God's way of
Submitted by ant on Sat, 10/29/2011 - 11:34am.
P.S. Maybe it's God's way of making me sympathetic to Jer or any conservative invited on MSNBC.
You're the one who knows nothing, boy
Submitted by russedav on Sat, 10/29/2011 - 12:22pm.
Dear vaboxrboy. Please don't make blanket statements about things you know nothing about.
There's no such thing as the "homosex-" deranged fascist propaganda oxymoron (homo=same+sex=opposite?!) and never was, contradicting God's Word's "arsenokoitai" in 1 Corinthians 6:9 & 1 Timothy 1:10, no matter the lies of the deranged Metropolitan Community crowd and fellows likewise devoted to insane apostate antiChrist bigotry error exposed by "The gay invention" at http://touchstonemag.com/archives/article.php?id=18-10-036-f
Also see deranged, vile fascist pervert child molester-rapist Kinsey and his typical degenerate lies about the "10%" sodomite figure exposed at www.DrJudithReisman.org. Also see "ex-gay" Joe Dallas's many books refuting the delusional propaganda with God's truth.
It's ironic how perverts demand others hear them but demand "ex-gays" (e.g. http://exodus.to) be shut up, so it's only proper that they should be shut up too until they reciprocate, not to mention stop threatening the lives of the kids of "ex-gays" in typical infantile fascist fashion like they used against even praying old women in their war on CA's Prop 8 to get their way, proving them the mentally ill unfit for adult society they've long been known to be until they employed disreputable degenerate fascist politics to bully shrinkdom into submission and invent the various kinds of delusional nonsense about "orientation" and how they "can't change" which of course Exodus above has refuted for decades, available to those who aren't bigoted with an agenda, e.g. sick antiChrist Demoncrats like 0 & Michelle. God made Adam and Eve, not Adam & Steve, and ironically perverts can't even truly "have sex" which is only possible for male and female; only having climax through artificial contrivance, e.g. appropriately selfish masturbation, versus God's natural coitus against which these most unnatural folk are in selfish rebellion against their Creator in whose Blessed Face they raise the phallus and middle finger. The mental condition of sodomites produces Biblically illiteracy and rebellion against God's truth, until He overcomes it, and if they and their fellow feminist conspirators (e.g. Obama, Pelosi & Reid) aren't stopped it could very well be the end of civilization as we know it as reproductive rates plummet and our economy and nation crumble as a result. Only God can save us now, He on Whom we've turned our backs, which our Founders warned would surely be fatal.
Theology and Homosexuality
Submitted by Henry Clay on Sat, 10/29/2011 - 9:13pm.
As the resident theologian here let me set you straight- (no pun intended!). First of all your doctrine is all screwed up. No where in the Gospels a Mathew, Mark, Luke, or John does the Lord mention Homosexuality. He does mention judging others, and in his most powerful lesson the disciples ask him about a man performing miracles in Jesus’ name. They ask Jesus what they should do because he is not one of them. Jesus replies: He who is not against me is with me. That is some powerful stuff my friend.
Secondly, whenever anyone mentions homosexuality in the bible they quote two passages, first from the Old Testament Leviticus. But as a Christian you should know that Jesus’ death freed us from the Law. All we have to do is accept him to enter his kingdom and live by his teachings. The second passage comes from Paul. Personally, I’m not a big fan of Paul. He never met Jesus and persecuted the early Christians. In fact, he was egging the crowd on (if not participating) when Saint Stephen was stoned to death. He was a shady character who wanted control over the Church; directly at odds with James, John and Peter in teachings and doctrine. The point is- we all are sinners and have no room to judge. When the man comes back he’ll let us know.
As resident theologian you get an F
Submitted by cocodrie on Sat, 10/29/2011 - 9:35pm.
A big fat O.
Jesus fulfilled the law, He did not do away with it.
Matthew 4:4 - "But He answered and said, it is written, Man shall not live by bread alone but by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of God".
The old testament is still valid and that includes the commandments.
Jesus Loves You so much He died for you
Good evening, cocodrie.
Submitted by ant on Sat, 10/29/2011 - 10:35pm.
I heard an analogy that refers to the Ten Commandments as a kind of mirror for us, reflecting back those laws we cannot possibly, completely obey or fulfill and thereby showing our need for salvation. In other words, God knowing we couldn't keep those laws completely, even to the best of our efforts, and not really expecting us to. I know this isn't an open thread or theology class, but, what do you think of that analogy? and do you think the ten commandents themselves were another example of a foreshadowing of God's intention to make a new covenant? Like sacrificial animals and offerings are said to have been.
Good evening ant
Submitted by cocodrie on Sat, 10/29/2011 - 10:40pm.
I do agee with that analogy. I believe it was St. Paul that said we cannot be saved by the law. We are incapable of keeping it and are in need of forgiveness. Those who do not want to obey God's law use scripture either out of context or misquoted to justify their sin. Even the devil believes in Jesus and uses scripture to advance his cause.
I loved Mel Brooks in History of the World part 1 when Moses came down with the 20 commandments.
Jesus Loves You so much He died for you
Thanks, cocodrie
Submitted by ant on Sat, 10/29/2011 - 10:57pm.
Though I became a serious doubter in my early 20's (nothing wrong with that, I suppose, He is known to welcome questions), I find it compelling now that nothing in the New Testament contradicts the Old, especially as a matter of law and prophecy. And being familiar with your posts here, I thought I'd ask.
ant
Submitted by cocodrie on Sat, 10/29/2011 - 11:09pm.
The key to understanding God is to take Him at his word not what someone says His word means. Horton the elephant described God the best when he referred to himself. "I meant what I said and I said what I meant. An elephant is faithful one hundred percent."
Jesus Loves You so much He died for you
btw
Submitted by TruthMonger on Sun, 10/30/2011 - 5:37pm.
The Bible consistently tells us that homosexual activity is a sin (Genesis 19:1-13; Leviticus 18:22; 20:13; Romans 1:26-27; 1 Corinthians 6:9). Romans 1:26-27 teaches specifically that homosexuality is a result of denying and disobeying God. When people continue in sin and unbelief, God “gives them over” to even more wicked and depraved sin in order to show them the futility and hopelessness of life apart from God. 1 Corinthians 6:9 proclaims that homosexual “offenders” will not inherit the kingdom of God.
http://www.gotquestions.org/homosexuality-Bible.html
Congratulations Jimmy Carter!
If you're a "resident theologian," it's time for you to move.
Submitted by Mike Bratton on Sun, 10/30/2011 - 6:15pm.
Because your theology--to use a technical term--stinks.
As has been mentioned, Jesus fulfilled the Law, rather than nullifying it as you suggest. And since the Bible is divinely inspired, your "I'm not a big fan of Paul" remark is incredibly off the mark; the Scripture is God's Word, not Moses', David's, or Paul's.
The fact that you claim Paul never met Jesus either carelessly or purposefully ignores Paul's Damascus Road experience. You know, the one where he met Jesus personally?
Pack your bags, Hank. Your residency, at least as a "theologian," is terminated.
--Mike
Wait!!!!!!!!!!!!
Submitted by Blonde on Sun, 11/13/2011 - 8:13pm.
I thought you were our Master Thespian. Or....
Unmasked Lesbian. Or....
Intoxicated Serbian.
Handy Reference Guide to Obama's Gaffes and Goofs ~ Currently Numbering 200 (and Counting)
The MCC is a pseudo-Christian group, not a "church."
Submitted by Mike Bratton on Sat, 10/29/2011 - 8:25pm.
The MCC doesn't take the Bible as the authoritative Word of God, is not Christ-centered since it rejects Jesus' teachings, and makes an idol of sexual perversion.
And yes, the homosexual "community" openly mocks God when it seeks to suggest He either excuses or endorses behavior which He has already explicitly condemned as sin.
It would be a good idea, Chuck, for you to avoid such misrepresentations as you made previously in future posts. Thanks in advance.
--Mike
Beyond profane
Submitted by JJoujan on Sat, 10/29/2011 - 9:45am.
Mr. Bozell, however did you manage to choke your way through this horrible book? I used to think of myself as a person with a sense of humor, but most of what passes for comedy in television, film and books these days has left me standing on the shore waving goodbye. The insane truly have taken over.
Exactly the way I feel...
Submitted by Grumpy in Arizona on Sat, 10/29/2011 - 10:20am.
Thanks JJ.
And, thanks Mr. B for another great insight.
- Grump :o)
Isn't it funny how the
Submitted by ofnir on Sat, 10/29/2011 - 10:18am.
Isn't it funny how the criticisms of God(s) haven't changed since....well, the Greek philosophers were discussing the concepts back when they had a pantheon? The only difference is that it's gotten boorish and stupid. Even the entire concept of this isn't original. I remember mom talking about a book (can't remember the title) she read in the 60's that was the same idea.
Still waiting for the left to
Submitted by LAM SON 719 on Sat, 10/29/2011 - 10:46am.
Still waiting for the left to publish the "Big book of islam boy sex". They can publish garbage like this it but really beyond a few dozen retards who will read it?
Unless those christian
Submitted by MrSnuggles on Sat, 10/29/2011 - 11:14am.
Unless those christian churches exist to help gays overcome their sinful ways, they are pure mockery. How else could you describe a church that denies homosexuality is a sin?
Once the left places
Submitted by jkwtrading on Sat, 10/29/2011 - 12:06pm.
Once the left places themselves as god, they also place themselves vulnerable to see god first hand. 2012 might be the year many a leftie sees god.
The left is leading themselves to oblivion.
When do they start building their idols?
Submitted by hbnolikeee on Sat, 10/29/2011 - 1:05pm.
Oh right, the oval office.
illogic
Submitted by jazzact13 on Sat, 10/29/2011 - 1:20pm.
If one where to apply the illogic used in this book concerning Osteen, one would have to conclude...
That the author of the book, because of his obvious attack on Osteen and Christian leaders who have not caved to the pressure to accept the gay agenda, is really himself someone who wants to be like Osteen and those other leaders, since of course to attack something means that one really wants to be like the thing one is attacking.
That it is an undeniable fact that those media personalities harshest in the condemnations of those Christian leaders who do not cave to the pressure to accept the gay agenda are often those struggling hardest against their own inner urges to actually have the courage to stand up to the PC police and pressure, which is why they cannot reason straight.
But, such as this author never apply their illogic to themselves. Sufficient for them and their sycophantic followers is it to claim that those they hate and attack are the one who are doing the hating and attacking.
"Thoroughly worldly people never understand even the world; they rely altogether on a few cynical maxims which are not true."
Chesterton, Orthodoxy
Since muslims believe that
Submitted by eaglewingz08 on Sat, 10/29/2011 - 8:01pm.
Since muslims believe that the Quran is the Last Testament and definitive Testament, this hack writer has insulted a billion muslims with his book. Oh, and I bet there's not an iota in the screed about the loving ways of Islam.
I wonder how these
Submitted by dzejk113 on Sun, 10/30/2011 - 1:28pm.
I wonder how these religion-hating leftists react to the various pagan reconstructionist religions. And by that, I do not mean that fabricated wiccan or neo-druidism BS that has no basis on actual history. Alot of those old European pagan religions weren't very fond of homosexuality either, the Greeks and Romans being an exception of course, and they had alot of gods. We see how bent out of shape the left gets over just one, how crazy would they get over several?
Hmmm.
Submitted by pcnav on Mon, 10/31/2011 - 10:12am.
I, myself am not that religious but of the majority I've met that are it only made them better people. So, my believe is leave them alone. My mother was extremely religious as well and she lead the purest life possible.
GOD
Submitted by Prisondog1776 on Tue, 11/01/2011 - 3:22am.
Why does this story spell GOD this way? WHY????????????? http://www.israelnationalnews.com/News/News.aspx/149264#.Tq9Uw3Eah1l