Naomi Wolf Writes Biography About Her Lady Parts

Your humble correspondent is so fascinated by his own navel that he spends hours each day just staring at it. In fact, I am so absorbed by that body part that I am planning on writing a biography about it called "Belly Button: A New Biography."

Should you think that I am over the top in narcissistic self-absorbtion, that is nothing compared to the book that former Al Gore "alpha male" consultant, Naomi Wolf, has written. I shall put the title of her about to be released book under the fold to give you the opportunity to put your coffee mugs down to spare drenching your computer monitors. Okay, are you ready? Here is the title:


Vagina: A New Biography.

I kid you not. Here is the Amazon review of Wolf's 400 page paean to absurd narcissism:

An astonishing work of cutting-edge science and cultural history that radically reframes how we understand the vagina—and consequently, how we understand women—from one of our most respected cultural critics and thinkers, Naomi Wolf, author of the modern classic The Beauty Myth.

When an unexpected medical crisis sends Naomi Wolf on a deeply personal journey to tease out the intersections between sexuality and creativity, she discovers, much to her own astonishment, an increasing body of scientific evidence that suggests that the vagina is not merely flesh, but an intrinsic component of the female brain—and thus has a fundamental connection to female consciousness itself.

Utterly enthralling and totally fascinating, Vagina: A New Biography draws on this set of insights about "the mind-vagina connection" to reveal new information about what women really need, and considers what a sexual relationship—and a relationship to the self—transformed by these insights could look like.

Exhilarating and groundbreaking, Vagina: A New Biography combines rigorous science, explained for lay readers, with cultural history and deeply personal considerations of the role of female desire in female identity, creativity, and confidence, from interviewees of all walks of life. Heralded by Publishers Weekly as one of the best science books of the year, it is a provocative and deeply engaging book that elucidates the ties between a woman's experience of her vagina and her sense of self; her impulses, dreams, and courage; and her role in love and in society in completely new and revelatory ways sure to provoke impassioned conversation.

A brilliant and nuanced synthesis of physiology, history, and cultural criticism, Vagina: A New Biography explores the physical, political, and spiritual implications of this startling series of new scientific breakthroughs for women and for society as a whole, from a writer whose conviction and keen intelligence have propelled her works to the tops of bestseller lists, and firmly into the realms of modern classics.

Wow! Not only is Wolf's body part biography utterly enthralling and totally fascinating but as a bonus it is also exhilarating and groundbreaking!

Hey Naomi! I have noticed that one of my toes curves sharply to the left. I not only find this utterly enthralling and totally fascinating but what I also find exhilarating and groundbreaking is that, as a result, it forms a sharp V with the big toe next to it. So could you put me in touch with your publisher so I can pitch my book proposal for "Toe: A New Biography?" I am sure readers will find it to be a brilliant and nuanced synthesis of phisiology, history, and cultural criticism chock full of physical, political, and spiritual implications.

UPDATE: I just noticed that Amazon is recommending a package deal with another book that is frequently sold with this one:

Frequently Bought Together
Vagina: A New Biography + Hallucinations
Price For Both: $34.95M

One of these items ships sooner than the other. Show details
Buy the selected items together

This item: Vagina: A New Biography by Naomi Wolf Hardcover $18.47
Hallucinations by Oliver Sacks Hardcover $16.48

So people who buy Wolf's book frequently buy Hallucinations?

P.J. Gladnick
P.J. Gladnick
P.J. Gladnick is a freelance writer and creator of the DUmmie FUnnies blog.