Ft. Lauderdale Sun-Sentinel Goes Chicken Little With Laughable Rising Sea Hysteria

The sky is falling! The sky is falling!

Oops! I mean the sea is rising! The sea is rising!

Such is the premise, chock full of laughable hysteria mixed in with premonitions of massive governmental spending based on a theory yet to be proven, in this Fort Lauderdale Sun-Sentinel front page story by David Fleshler. As Chicken Little Fleshler describes, the plan to combat an unproven problem isn't just any plan, it's a BATTLE plan:

A battle plan for an anticipated assault by seawater has been drafted by four South Florida counties, attempting to protect one of the nation's most vulnerable regions from the impact of climate change.

The proposal by Broward, Palm Beach, Miami-Dade and Monroe counties calls for 108 actions to deal with rising sea levels and other consequences of global warming.

If you detect a massive hit on the taxpayers behind this "battle plan" along with the 108 actions (not 105, 106, or 107 but 108) you would be right:

Among the steps: Redesigning low-lying roads to keep them above water, restricting development in vulnerable areas and relocating drinking-water wells inland to protect them from contamination by salt water. The plan contains no cost estimates.

"No cost estimates" means hold on to your wallets because open ended governmental  spending is on the way! Of course any predictions about Global Warming along with flooding are incomplete without the all-important word "could" and Fleshler does not disappoint:

Sea levels in South Florida could rise by one foot by 2040-2070 and two feet from 2060 to 2115, according to an analysis prepared by the scientific staff of the four counties, using federal, state and academic studies.

If you think these "action plans" would cost hundreds of millions of dollars, you would be wrong. The overall "battle plan" as proposed would cost billions and billions of dollars as the late Carl Sagan would have said:

There would be new design standards for roads and bridges in low-lying areas, and vulnerable areas would be assessed to see whether roads should be rerouted. Existing roads could be modified to make sure they're high enough and have adequate drainage. This could be done in the course of road improvements that take place anyway in areas with poor drainage, except that under the plan roads would be modified for anticipated sea levels rather than just for current drainage difficulties.

Yeah, the dollar signs are rolling even as Fleshler types. Since the average elevation of South Florida is only about 6 feet, "modifying" existing roads would be a multi-billion dollar task since the highest ground altitudes in this area are known as speed bumps. Mr. C.L. Fleshler then goes on to assure us that according to "experts" Global Warming is a FACT, Jack!

The vast majority of climate researchers have concluded that global warming is taking place and is caused by human activities. Among the organizations endorsing this view are the American Meteorological Society, American Geophysical Union, National Academy of Sciences, American Association for the Advancement of Science and World Meteorological Organization.

And here is where Fleshler gets very disingenuous at his devious best...or worst. He doesn't cite any of the many scientists with contrary viewpoints about Global Warming or flooding. Instead he quotes a non-scientist Tea Party member in a pathetic attempt to marginalize any opinion that dares to counter the liberal Global Warming dogma:

Tony Coulter, a member of South Florida Tea Party, said there's a lot of skepticism about climate change among the group's members but said the issue is not high on their agenda, which focuses on shrinking government, protecting Constitutional rights and lowering taxes.

So how tough would it have been to find a qualified scientist to counter the sea rising narrative presented by Fleshler? Some very brief research on the topic would have quickly yielded the name of the person considered to be the world's leading expert on the subject of sea levels, Doctor Nils-Axel Mörner. And what does Dr. Mörner think about the unproven theory of the rising seas? This UK Telegraph article reveals the answer:

...if there is one scientist who knows more about sea levels than anyone else in the world it is the Swedish geologist and physicist Nils-Axel Mörner, formerly chairman of the INQUA International Commission on Sea Level Change. And the uncompromising verdict of Dr Mörner, who for 35 years has been using every known scientific method to study sea levels all over the globe, is that all this talk about the sea rising is nothing but a colossal scare story.

Despite fluctuations down as well as up, "the sea is not rising," he says. "It hasn't risen in 50 years."

...The reason why Dr Mörner, formerly a Stockholm professor, is so certain that these claims about sea level rise are 100 per cent wrong is that they are all based on computer model predictions, whereas his findings are based on "going into the field to observe what is actually happening in the real world".

And in the "real world" politicians are constantly on the lookout for ways to scam money from the public with help from "journalist" allies such as Chicken Little Fleshler. Unfortunately for Fleshler the vast majority of the readers posting comments to his story saw right through him. Here is a sampling of the comments:

Hey Broward...don't forget to draft that emergency preparedness plan for the boogey-man...rumor (not science) has it he's coming too!

People who are promoting this and part of the cabal to build roads that would withstand a two foot rise in sea level need to be arrested today and put in prison for theft of public money. The sea level may rise and it may as likely fall since we know florida was once completly under water and there was a large sea in the center of the USA.

I hope I'm around long enough to se the follow-up story years from now. "Billions Wasted on Climate Change Hoax"

Even my notorious Cousin Chile, aka the Venezuelan Zorba the Greek, with a long string of wives, ex-wives, girlfriends, and children scattered all over the Andes displays a better sense of responsibility than Fleshler with this absurd Chicken Little hysteria story.

P.J. Gladnick
P.J. Gladnick
P.J. Gladnick is a freelance writer and creator of the DUmmie FUnnies blog.