DUers Invent Highly Laughable Excuses to Explain Fox News Ratings Success

By P.J. Gladnick | June 29, 2009 | 19:20

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Few things drive the denizens of the Democratic Underground into a frenzy like the mere mention of Fox News. Therefore, as you can expect, a story in the Hollywood Reporter, Fox News set for best year yet, sent the members of what they call the "reality-based community" into some very unreal yet highly entertaining reactions to that unwelcome news. But before we allow the DUers to take the comedy stage, let us take a look at the Hollywood Reporter story by James Hibberd that sent them into a divorced-from-reality frenzy:

Fox News is on track to have its most-watched year ever, showing significant ratings growth despite having just come off a highflying election year.
With the second quarter coming to a close, Fox News averaged about the same number of viewers as the top three other cable news networks combined. And while rivals including CNN (-22%) and MSNBC (-18%) took hits following last quarter's inauguration-fueled boost, Fox News (-3%) remained nearly steady.

Compared with last year, the Fox News (averaging 2.1 million viewers, 509,000 adults 25-54 quarter-to-date) is up 35% over last year in primetime viewers and 48% in the demo. CNN (805,000 viewers, 210,000 in demo) fell 16% in viewers and 29% in the demo. MSNBC (787,000 viewers, 259,000 in demo) climbed 15% in viewers and about on par, -3%, in the demo. And CNN Headline News (553,000, 201,000) showed very strong growth, up 39% and 37%, respectively, and is on track for its best second quarter.

The new standings are strong enough to rank Fox News third behind USA and TNT among all ad-supported cable networks for the quarter among primetime total viewers. In its core demo, Fox News had eight of the top 10 cable news shows. It had similarly sunny increases for total day, while CNN and MSNBC were roughly on par with last year.

Earning double-digit growth after an election year is quite a feat for a news network. With Fox News best known for such right-leaning personalities as Sean Hannity and Bill O'Reilly, one might assume having a Democrat in the White House somehow helps boost viewership.

A dominant political party indeed can fuel the popularity of opposing voices -- Comedy Central's "The Daily Show With Jon Stewart" and "The Colbert Report" and liberal online news hubs Huffington Post and Daily Kos came to prominence during George W. Bush's tenure, just as talk radio conservatives like Rush Limbaugh and news sites like Drudge Report rose during the Clinton years.

But it's important to note that when Fox News took the ratings lead during the Bush era, some pundits declared that the network was winning only because a Republican was in charge. Those at the network get weary of outsiders assuming their success must be due to some fortunate external factor rather than their own day-to-day work.

This information induced quite a range of unintentionally hilarious reactions from the DUers. However, a warning. Do not attempt to read their responses while drinking any form of liquid or you risk thoroughly soaking your computer monitor. ....Okay, assuming you put down your coffee cups, wine glasses, or beer mugs, here goes. Strap on your seat belts as we quickly fly over the alternate DU universe with our spy cameras:

My theory is that the right wingers who give Fox those big numbers watch a lot of TV. On the other hand, progressives don't watch as much TV and spend more time on the Internet instead.
It means the Fox viewers are too dumb to change the channel.
And I don't need to watch them in order to know what they're saying. I only need to log on to DU. Same with Free Republic. I've never once been over to their site, yet I know all about them. Half their watchers are rooting against them and aren't fans. Without the opposition tuning in for their laugh of the day FOX would sink like rock.
They need to turn them off at Hotels. I travel a lot and about every hotel has fox news on in the lobby and in the breakfast area. For some reason there is a policy at hotels that make them all tune to Fox. You can ask for the station to be changes and I have, but it feels like a loosing battle sometimes.
Those f---ing hotels keep this sh-t on their tv screens because liberals and Dems are too busy or too scared to tell them it's sh-t, it's lies and if they want US to come stay in their f---ing hotels they'd turn that crap off!

And now for a bit of DU condescension toward the "ordinary" people:

I'm always astounded by the big flat screen TV at my dry cleaners. It's always on Fox news. Yet the people who work there are at best semi-literate, working part-time (so the SOB who owns the place can get by with minimum wages and no benefits).

And, finally, what sounds like a threat: