Bill Maher on Bristol Palin: 'The S--t Doesn't Fall Far From The Bat'
Bill Maher on Friday once again spent a good amount of his HBO program bashing Sarah Palin and her family.
In the concluding segment, the "Real Time" host actually said of Bristol, "The s--t doesn't fall far from the bat" (video follows with transcript and commentary, vulgarity warning):
BILL MAHER: In Bristol’s new memoir "Not Afraid of Life" - working title, "Whoops, There's a Dick in Me” - Bristol claims that the night she lost her virginity she had accidentally gotten drunk on wine coolers that she didn't know contained alcohol and then blacked out and didn't remember a thing. Oh, the Palins. I tell you, the shit doesn't fall far from the bat.
[Applause]
Bristol, just admit it. You were horny, and while we're at it stop claiming that you were on birth control pills that didn't work when you got pregnant. Here's a tip, hon: they're not birth control pills if they're shaped like Fred Flintstone.
Pleasant, isn't it?
This came moments after Maher referred to Bristol's mother as a "ditzy beauty queen" with "uninformed opinions."
Are the sexist attacks on female conservatives by members of the media ever going to end?
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Comments
Ugly Zydokomuno
Submitted by Xpat48 on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 6:50pm.
Typical ugly Zydokomuno.
Working title: "Whoops, There's a Dick in Me”
Submitted by Turn Right on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 7:17pm.
That's what the studio says whenever Maher arrives to do the show.
Ain't that the truth! Good
Submitted by 1Bravesfan on Mon, 06/27/2011 - 10:19am.
Ain't that the truth! Good one Turn Right!
"Whoops There's A D!ck In Me"
Submitted by Clutch1956 on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 6:59pm.
Sh!tstain Billy has just given us the name of his autobiography. The $64K question is "whose and where"? It could be any number of famous liberals and Billy Orifice has his "hot and fresh" light lit whenever and wherever one of his liberal masters needs a willing, unquestioning receptacle to dump a load.
A little thing called originality...
Submitted by TempusFugit on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 7:10pm.
"they're not birth control pills if they're shaped like Fred Flintstone"
That line was stolen directly from Rodney Dangerfield. Donkey Face, I watched a lot of (and laughed a lot at) Rodney, and you are no Rodney Dangerfield. You're not even as funny as Rodney King.
Maher's Rodney King catchphrase
Submitted by HockeyKid on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 8:54pm.
would be, "Can't we all just get a bong?"
"Beauty is only skin deep, but liberal's to the bone." - me
Yes, but
Submitted by HockeyKid on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 7:29pm.
they ARE birth control if they're shaped like Bill Maher's face--no woman would get within 10 yards of that.
Bill, here's a tip, dude: it's called comedy. Try writing it yourself for a change.
"Beauty is only skin deep, but liberal's to the bone." - me
As always...
Submitted by motherbelt on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 7:31pm.
No class, all a$$.
Maher and his NYT guest
Submitted by kg on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 7:51pm.
"Bill Maher implying Alabama and Kansas are not the "smart states."
David Carr: "If it's Kansas, Missouri, no big deal. You know, that's the dance of the low sloping foreheads. The middle places, right? [pause] Did I just say that aloud?"
http://www.realclearpolitics.com/video/2011/06/24/nyts_david_carr_middle...
"DumbAssity of Dope"
Bill and his viewers are clueless.
Submitted by Bhaal on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 7:41pm.
In his movie Religulous, if memory serves, Bill stated that anyone believing in God was crazy. It's been documented that Barak Obama is a believer. With Maher just admitting he is definetly going to vote for Obama that makes him look stupid by his own words one way or the other.
I do agree that Palin should not say she was blacked out
Submitted by VanPastorMan on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 7:52pm.
because wine coolers won't do that unless you drink 30 of them. I doubt she did that. On the issue of birth control pills. It is very possible that she was on them and they didn't work. If she got her pills from Planned Parenthood then they sometimes give girls the pills where you have to take them at exactly the same time everyday and you can't miss one. They give the girls these weaker pills because they know most girls are not responsibile and will forget. Then they will get pregnant and need an abortion. I've heard testimonies from several former Planned Parenthood directors who claimed this is true.
30 Wine Coolers?
Submitted by Radical1979 on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 8:00pm.
It certainly could make someone black out. They have more alcohol than beer, and depending on her tolerance, it could take far fewer than 30 to cause a blackout.
~Yes, it could
Submitted by Wrathful Brunette on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 8:12pm.
though you don't go instantly from sober to blacked out. She should have noticed well before it got to that stage. I'm sure that, like a lot of girls, she didn't realize the certitude of being taken advantage of once her inhibitions were loosened. This is the reason I never, ever, ever had more than one drink at any party or gathering of any sort. And I kept my hand over my drink the whole time if I was in a pub. (At the suggestion of a male friend, I never would have thought of such a thing, myself)
Drilled into my daughter...
Submitted by Radical1979 on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 8:23pm.
by public school, was the threat of being ruffied. It's also likely that the Palin's don't drink, and thus didn't really prepare Bristol for those situations. I'm not blaming them. There are sooo many things out there, and it's impossible to warn our kids about all of them. Especially when they get to the teen years and know so much.
~Never once
Submitted by Wrathful Brunette on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 8:36pm.
did either one of my parents talk to me about boys or alcohol. Fortunately I was amply endowed with common sense and good taste in friends. Also, I've always despised the pack mentality and was therefore immune to "peer pressure".
I did a lot of talking
Submitted by Radical1979 on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 8:54pm.
But I think my daughter had some good teachers who she respected who she actually listened to.
I don't care if she puts her fingers in her ears and sings "lalala", I'm still going to tell her what I think she should know.
It's getting better, thankfully.
~Frankly
Submitted by Wrathful Brunette on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 9:09pm.
I don't know what my parents were thinking. Perhaps they thought they would always keep me away from all "evil influences" or something. I remember one time when my dad didn't want me to go to a party held at the house of the president of the honor society I belonged to because, as he said, "There might be alcohol there". I looked at him in disbelief and said, "There's alcohol everywhere, that doesn't mean I drink it".
Wait wait wait: youre saying
Submitted by balboa on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 10:09pm.
Wait wait wait: youre saying that planned parenthood gives people birth control pills that are intentionally difficult to use effectively so that the woman will get pregnant and then planned parenthood will get money for performing the abortion?
I don't believe it either, bal
Submitted by Cool Arrow on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 10:14pm.
But our President says doctors would rather chop off a foot than treat an infection.
CA
Submitted by well99 on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 10:31pm.
Shows how stupid our president is.Doctors spent over 6 months working on my foot and leg and it is still there.Let me check.Yup.Guess the Chosen One is lying.
When
Submitted by Tjexcite on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 7:57pm.
Are the sexist attacks on female conservatives by members of the media ever going to end? When they die....Any change in white house occupant to be one of these targets or friends of these targets will only turn up the volume 1000 fold and spreed not only to once a week on a show that no people pay to get. It will be on the tongue of every member of that group and in front of every camera the see.Mahar is a sad, pathetic homonculus
Submitted by Slyrr on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 8:11pm.
It's no wonder Mahar and his cohorts hate America and want to destroy morality.
It wasn't that long ago, if ANY man had said that about someone's wife or daughter, they'd be ridden out of town on a rail. And odds were, they'd also get a royal beating.
I'd say Mr. Palin is within every right to give Mahar a black eye if he ever meets him.
Hell, Sarah could kick this
Submitted by killa37 on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 10:09pm.
Hell, Sarah could kick this ugly faggots ass with one hand behind tied behind her back, and out-debate him with half her brain tied behind her back also.
Of course, I'd like to let see Todd Palin get in a few uppercuts after Sarah 'softens him up'......
which might take 5-7 seconds.
This guy deserves ANY bad thing that would come his way............he's earned it.
tracy morgan type apology tour for misogyny?
Submitted by merly1 on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 8:23pm.
Of course not, the target is acceptable to the lamestream media.....
"Whoops There's a Dick"
Submitted by syvyn11 on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 8:45pm.
Should be the title of Marah's show.
Actually
Submitted by Tugboat Phil on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 9:23pm.
for Maher, a better title would be, "Whoops There's a Wee Wee."
OHHH, now it is clear.
Submitted by BTW Biological ... on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 8:59pm.
"Here's a tip, hon: they're not birth control pills if they're shaped like Fred Flintstone."
Considering that pro-choice advocates make the claim that many women were using birth control when they had an unplanned pregnancy and choose abortion, according to Maher it would be logical to assume that all those women were just horny and taking Flintstone Vitamins for birth control. Now what does that say about safe sex education?
I dunno--
Submitted by HockeyKid on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 9:05pm.
maybe that Maher was too busy giggling every time the teacher said "breast" to pay attention?
And that was just last week...
"Beauty is only skin deep, but liberal's to the bone." - me
Opps
Submitted by BTW Biological ... on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 9:36pm.
Chose not choose.
Wonder
Submitted by grammajane on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 9:23pm.
Wonder what some woman did to this ugly has been. There must be some "logical" reason why he hates women ..............hmm. Second thought, how would any woman waste time with such a nasty wreck of a human
This should serve as a lesson for NB's
Submitted by Boudin on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 9:28pm.
If you dont what to see it in the subject line, dont spell it out in the article.
Sarah Palin said Maher was nothing but crass
Submitted by HockeyKid on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 9:40pm.
and all Stupid Bill could do was try to chastise her for mocking Asians.
See that, Bill? That's how you do original lines, instead of stealing material.
But then, as the son of a radio news announcer, it must come naturally for you. You obviously were only taught to read other people's work.
Out loud.
There's an interesting question: can Bill Maher read without moving his lips?
Bill tried to be an actor. He's the only guy with a star on Hollywood Boulevard who's made 17 movies that no one has ever seen.
Bill lists Don Rickles as one of his influences. Don Rickles lists Bill as too dumb to make hockey puck.
Maher says people assume he goes to the Playboy mansion a lot, but that he actually goes there only three or four times a year. Problem is, he only leaves once or twice.
Maher says he doesn't go out with bimbos, only smart women--ones who agree with him. Who knew so many politically obsessed nuclear physicists hung out at the Playboy mansion and engaged in post-breakup gold-digger lawsuits?
But seriously, folks, don't worry about Bill Maher. If his "entertainment" career doesn't get any better, his nose will always have a job as Obama's offical a&& warmer.
"Beauty is only skin deep, but liberal's to the bone." - me
Bravo,
Submitted by Boudin on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 9:52pm.
You are definitely funnier then donkeyface
→ Ladies and Gentlemen! HockeyKid!
Submitted by Cool Arrow on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 10:00pm.
He's here all week! Try the veal! Tip your waitstaff!
Good stuff HK.
Maher Is...
Submitted by GeneralAl on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 9:44pm.
Maher is an example of medical malpractice! When he was born, they mistakenly threw away the child and kept the afterbirth!
"Old Soldiers never die, they just fade away"!
Let's Replace Bristol with Maher's Mother...
Submitted by gruyere cheese on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 9:47pm.
Would this clown use the same words...maybe not.
Oh, the Maher's, the shit doesn't fall far from the bat..
Submitted by gruyere cheese on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 9:52pm.
It is not funny when you apply it to your family...doesn't it? This sorry excuse for a comedian must have a very proud family member cheering for him.
the best part of Billie Maher
Submitted by Clutch1956 on Sun, 06/26/2011 - 12:21am.
dribbled down the inside of his mom's thigh onto the No-Tell Motel's (with hourly rates!) mattress. He was never too sure who his daddy was, but the Russian Navy was in town that week so he thinks it might have been the garbage scow's diesel mechanic or someone of lesser stature. Mom saved and gave him half the wages from that night, he still has the two rubles.
PALIN SHOULD KICK HIS ASS
Submitted by MCLANTIERE on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 10:31pm.
SARAH Plain , that is. If she wants to be skyrocketed to UNPARALLELED national prominence ... she -- Sarah Palin -- should tell that POS Maher that SHE (NOT TODD) is ready and WILLING --- on NATIONAL TV -- to kick his effeminate ASS, for the HONOR of her family. If she does THAT ... the conservative minions will follow her ANYWHERE! A person attacking people's children like this needs severe injury.
Otherwise, Todd Palin should simple disembowel Maher ... and I'm ok with that, too.
He better watch out. Bristol
Submitted by Free Stinker on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 11:14pm.
He better watch out. Bristol might send Piper over to kick his ass.
/// Sarah Palin Fan since July 11, 2007 /// خال
Maher
Submitted by jessieH on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 11:17pm.
This fool is running on Soros' money.
i do not understand why a
Submitted by jm1656 on Sat, 06/25/2011 - 11:22pm.
i do not understand why a REPUBLICAN would ever go on this guys show. unless they are not Republicans. that would explain it.
I always
Submitted by bobbys on Sun, 06/26/2011 - 1:44am.
I always take my Flintstones vitamins after i eat me lucky charms...
He actually came to my town recently and was an
Submitted by gmaniac1 on Sun, 06/26/2011 - 4:37am.
absolute bust. He couldn't even sell out his smut and filth to some of the liberals I know here. HBO will never get my business and I told the local cable company that too! The girl on the phone had the "audacity" to debate me about this idiot. By the time I got off the phone her silence was well.. deafening;)
HBO Garbage
Submitted by RealVet on Sun, 06/26/2011 - 8:17am.
One more reason to cancel or boycott Homo Box Orifice.
To understand this properly
Submitted by SLUGGO on Sun, 06/26/2011 - 10:10am.
Is Bristol Palin saying she was raped? She said she accidentally got drunk on wine coolers she had thought were non-alcoholic. Did someone switch the non-alcoholic beverage for one with alcohol? What I am concluding from her statements is that she unknowingly got drunk and blacked out, and when she came to she was pregnant. Something criminal happened and someone should go to jail for a very long time.
Sluggo
Sluggo, your well on your way
Submitted by Boudin on Sun, 06/26/2011 - 10:57am.
1st, She thought she loved Levi
2nd, This would be nearly impossible to prosecute Levi, a long time boy-friend.
For all the libtard grief this admission would predictably give her, I think Bristol has shown great courage.
It's not her fault, that this is the exact technique Maher uses with the ladies
Apple doesn't fall far from the tree?
Submitted by Mike009 on Sun, 06/26/2011 - 10:28am.
"The s*it doesn't fall far from the bat." Huh? I never heard that expression before in my life. I always thought it was Dennis Miller who went in for obscure culural subrefrences. I guess I'll have to start reading lefty blogs. Is that supposed to be like the apple doesn't fall far from the tree?
Bill Maher has a mouth like a sewer
Submitted by needle on Sun, 06/26/2011 - 11:04pm.
And we all know what flows straight out of that
- Looking forward to the self-annihilation of the Manipulated Stories Machine.
FU Donkey Face
Submitted by Bill Brasky on Mon, 06/27/2011 - 1:15am.
This creep is going to get what is coming to him.
How low will America go?
Submitted by tinydancer on Mon, 06/27/2011 - 10:36am.
That this piece of dirt actually has a t.v. show and there are actually people who actually watch him.
Proof that too many Americans have to look UP to see the curb.
Maher is vile, disgusting, repugnant, perverted.
He should thank the Palins
Submitted by Orpheus75 on Mon, 06/27/2011 - 10:39am.
Without them, he probably wouldn't have anything to say on his show. He'd actually have to come up with something intelligent, and THAT obviously isn't going to happen.
Worthless
Submitted by scout on Mon, 06/27/2011 - 10:46am.
Bill Maher...Not worth the time to even come up with a comment.
Worthless
Submitted by scout on Mon, 06/27/2011 - 10:47am.
Bill Maher...Wasn't his mom picked up by the Navy for swimming after troop ships?
Bill Maher
Submitted by bookrow1 on Mon, 06/27/2011 - 6:34pm.
Bill Maher is a worthless scumbag. This begs the question, "What does this say about the type of people that find him entertaining?" For the ones who say that she couldn't have blacked out from the wine coolers, that is like saying that because most people don't die from wasp stings that no one can.
call your cable or satellite provider....
Submitted by thescoots on Tue, 06/28/2011 - 2:21pm.
and cancel HBO if you have it...Make sure to tell them why you are cancelling in two words: Bill Maher. Believe me...its a liberating feeling....when enough plugs are pulled on HBO because of this turd.....they will pull his.