Elton John Wants to Guest Star on 'Glee' and Sleep With 16-Year-Old Gay Character

63-year-old aging rock star Elton John wants to be a guest star on the hit TV series "Glee" with the storyline that he's the lover of the overbearing coach of the cheerleaders, but he ends up in bed with the show's 16-year-old gay virgin.

This was revealed by the Emmy Award-winning co-star of the program Jane Lynch on Monday's "Tonight Show" (video follows with transcript and commentary):

JAY LENO, HOST: Now, I want to, is there any truth that Elton John will be on “Glee,” is this true?

JANE LYNCH, “GLEE”: I don't know if he'll be on "Glee,” but, he loves the show.

LENO: Mm-hmm.

LYNCH: He came up to me at the event and said that he had had lunch with Ryan Murphy, who is the guy who created our show.

LENO: Right.

LYNCH: He's our lord and creator, and…

LENO: Right.

LYNCH: He pitched Ryan some potential storylines that he could be a part of. He said the first thing he said, “What I'd like to do is perhaps be your lover, but I end up in bed with Chris.”

[ Laughter ]

LYNCH: Now Chris on the show is sixteen, so that would be jail bait, would it not?

LENO: Yeah. That would be. That would not be. Yeah. That would tend to frown on that.

LYNCH: Yes. But I hope he'll be on the show.

LENO: Well, it sounds like him, because, you know, 'cause he’s one of those of those hot and cold.

LYNCH: Yeah.

LENO: “No. Get away.” Or, if he came up to you guys with ideas, that means he wants to be on the show.

LYNCH: Well, that would be great. I mean, I think it would be awesome. Wouldn’t it?

LENO: That would be cool, yeah.

Yeah, that would be awesome and so cool. Let's get a 63-year-old guy on the show that proposed ending up in bed with one of the lead characters who happens to be a 16-year-old gay virgin.

That would be must-see TV.

But the depravity here on John's part goes even further.

If he actually is a fan of the show, he must know that Kurt, the character Chris Colfer plays, is a totally naive, innocent, sweet kid that has no idea what sex is. That includes homosexual sex.

In last week's episode - full disclosure, I'm a huge fan of the show - we found out that Kurt is so innocent when it comes to sex that his gay bestfriend approached his father to have a pseudo "birds and the bees" discussion with his son.

The friend's fear was that Kurt is so naive and innocent that his first sexual encounter could be with the wrong person for all the wrong reasons, and it could end up being unprotected.

Kurt's father then had a chat with his son - pamphlets and all - until Kurt got so embarrassed by it he excused himself and walked out of the kitchen.

So, yes, let's get 63-year-old Elton John on the show despite his desire to end up in bed with this fictitious child.

By all means.

Noel Sheppard
Noel Sheppard
Noel Sheppard, Associate Editor of NewsBusters, passed away in March of 2014.