During Thursday’s Jimmy Kimmel Live, the eponymous host took several shots at President Trump during his opening monologue. It did not take long for Kimmel to begin mocking the people donating to the GoFundMe page set up to secure money for the border wall, claiming that “a lot of these people are dipping into their meth money for this.”
Kimmel began by talking about the President’s upcoming vacation, where he remarked that “Mike Pence will be checked into a kennel and the President will jet to Mar-a-Lago.” Kimmel predicted that “this could be the last Christmas Don Jr. will be able to spend with his dad without being separated by a glass partition,” as the crowd erupted into laughter. After recycling left-wing talking points on government shutdowns, Kimmel informed his audience that Trump “might not need Mexico or Congress to pay for the wall at all because there are some very dopey people ready to pay for it themselves.”
At this point, Kimmel explained how a Trump supporter named Brian Kolfage started a GoFundMe campaign dedicated to securing funding for the wall that had reached $9 million at the time of Thursday’s broadcast. Kimmel went on to mock the people who have donated to the campaign for “donating money for a wall that will never exist, it’s like starting a college fund for Harry Potter,” advising them that “a more useful thing to do with your money would be to go outside and feed it to a bird.”
Kimmel sarcastically added: “But you do have to admire the sacrifice they’re making. I mean, a lot of these people are dipping into their meth money for this.”
Kimmel proceeded to unravel a satirical children’s book called “How The Trump Saved Christmas.” The cover featured President Trump portrayed as an overweight man with a pot belly wearing nothing but a tie. The entire book was loaded with unflattering cartoon depictions of the President and numerous shots at him and his supporters.
The book began with the verse “The Trump hated Christmas like he hated Don Lemon, like he hates Robert Mueller and people in Yemen.” The first page cartoon featured a Grinch-like Trump breaking a candy cane accompanied by pictures of Mueller, Lemon, and Yemen covered with darts.
As Newsbusters has pointed out, this type of bullying is nothing new for Kimmel. As 2019 continues to approach, it seems more likely than not that his ABC program will continue to operate as just another arm of #TheResistance.
A transcript of the relevant portion of Thursday’s edition of Jimmy Kimmel Live is below. Click “expand” to read more.
ABC's Jimmy Kimmel Live
December 20, 2018
11:40 p.m. Eastern
JIMMY KIMMEL: Very good. You know, the President is heading, heading home tomorrow. He’s off to Florida for 16 days. Is the President allowed to go away for 16 days? That’s like five Scaramuccis worth of days. That’s a lot of them. Tomorrow morning, Mike Pence will be checked into a kennel and the President will jet to Mar-a-Lago, his private club where Trump will once again host his annual New Year’s Eve Party. Two years, you know, he charged guests to this party $575 a head to come. Then last year, it went up to $750 a head. This year, he’s charging $1,000 a head; $1,000 to ring in the new year with these two party animals. [LAUGHTER] That seems like fun. The whole Trump family will be there. I wonder if he makes them pay to come to the party. Ivanka gets in free, everyone else, full price but it’s a special holiday for the Trumps this year. This could be the last Christmas Don Jr. will be able to spend with his dad without being separated by a glass partition so...
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
Beautiful holiday. Trump is leaving Washington, D.C. an absolute mess. He caused quite a thing today. He announced today he’s not going to sign a resolution to fund the government. This is a deal that was crafted by Republicans. They thought he was going to sign it. He surprised them and said, I’m not signing it unless I get the $5 billion I want for my border wall. If he doesn’t get that money, which he won’t, tomorrow night at midnight the government will shut down, which means hundreds of thousands of workers won’t get paid. Basically, Trump is taking paychecks from federal employees at Christmas time to punish Congress for not paying for a wall he swore 500 times Mexico would be paying for. So Feliz Navidad, everyone. But here’s the twist…
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
The twist is the President might not need Mexico or Congress to pay for the wall at all because there are some very dopey people ready to pay for it themselves. This Trump supporter, a guy named Brian Kolfage, started a GoFundMe campaign to raise $1 billion for the wall. He launched it on Sunday. It’s already up to almost $9 million. People, this is what people do with their disposable income when they don’t have loans from college to pay off. [LAUGHTER] Donating money for a wall that will never exist. It’s like starting a college fund for Harry Potter. [LAUGHTER] It’s a, it’s a waste. A more useful thing to do with your money would be to go outside and feed it to a bird but you do have to admire the sacrifice they’re making. I mean, a lot of these people are dipping into their meth money for this and on top of all that, Trump’s Secretary of Defense, General Jim Mattis, surprised everyone and resigned today. I guess the rumor is he disagreed with Trump’s decision to withdraw troops from Syria, and as a result of that, he’s now the 13th member of Trump’s cabinet to depart in 20 months. There are only 24 people in the cabinet, by the way. [LAUGHTER] That includes the Vice President, who can’t leave. Eventually, Ben Carson’s going to be the only one left, eventually, if they can find him. Has anyone seen him this year? This has been a bigly week for the President…
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
Two big things. He declared victory against ISIS, and he told supporters he won the war on Christmas too. He won two wars this week. And of course, the liberal media doesn’t report it because all they want to do is tear him down and children need to know that this President is fighting for their favorite holiday. And with that said, I am very pleased to present this soon to be best-selling book. This is called “How the Trump Saved Christmas.” And would you like me, would you care me to read it to you?
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
Just this one time. All right, here we go. The Trump hated Christmas like he hated Don Lemon, like he hates Robert Mueller and people in Yemen. No one quite knows why he’s made this whole season. His dad didn’t love him, that could be a reason. It might have been fueled by the surly alt-right or just that his pants are four sizes too tight. Whatever the cause is, his dad or his pants, his outbursts on Twitter in capitalized rants, there’s a war on Christmas, he’d send with a sneer, to make MAGA hat wearers recoil with fear. It’s not that he cared one way or the other, it’s a hot-button issue that upsets your grandmother. If the Islamics and liberals get their own way, they’ll outlaw Merry Christmas, the Trump he would say. They’ll say “season’s greetings,” like we’re all Godless losers and force us to celebrate Hana-Kwanzaa- Paloozas. Well, this made the Trump angry, he’d had quite enough of inclusive non-Christmasey holiday stuff so he iced up his bone spurs and readied for war, unlike Vietnam half a century before. If I’m powerful enough to stare at an eclipse, I can put Merry Christmas on everyone’s lips. Then he shouted and bellowed that Santa’s in danger and that Nancy Pelosi will burn down the manger. Then suddenly it was over and he put it in writing, that he’d won this big war no one knew we were fighting. He bragged to his followers on Fox and on Friends that it’s safe to go say Merry Christmas again. He claimed he beat Starbucks, he tore them to pieces. They printed up cups that said “Happy birthday to Jesus.” And that’s how the Trump saved Christmas for all from the American heartland to the Mexican wall. So the next time you hear “Happy holiday,” say, “Wrong, Merry Christmas, the American way.” [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] And that is how the Trump saved Christmas.
