On Thursday, CBS’s The Late Show host Stephen Colbert reminded everyone how lewd and pathetic his behavior has been, tearing into White House senior counsel Kellyanne Conway as “Satan's trophy wife” during a shtick mocking her most recent Hannity appearance defending the Trump administration from Russian collusion claims.
“Of course, Trump's not the only one defending his son. Last night, senior White House advisor and Satan's trophy wife Kellyanne Conway appeared on Fox News and used a little visual aid to drive home her point,” Colbert proclaimed to the applause and laughter of the audience.
Here’s what Conway said on the Fox News Channel while holding up outsized flash cards with “collusion,” “conclusion,” “delusion,” and “illusion” on them:
I just want to review in case you run out of time. This is how I see it so far. This is to help all the people at home. What's the conclusion? Collusion, no. We don't have that yet. I see illusion and delusion, just so we are cleared, everyone. Four words. collusion, no, illusion, delusion, yes, I just thought we what have some fun with words.
Colbert then appeared after the clip to use large flash cards while the audience erupted with glee over his prediction that Donald Trump Jr. will go to jail:
Got some handy visual aides here. Trump, Jr. tried to articulate, but that turned out to incriminate. [APPLAUSE] Yeah, see easy to remember, it's something even idiot would anticipate, and now he's going to be an inmate. [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] Just thought we’d have some fun with words. Have those — have those sent to the Smithsonian.
The lefty comedian concluded his liberal stump speech (masquerading as a comedic monologue) by doing the opposite of what Wednesday’s National Civility Day was about: suggest that your political opponents want to kill people.
“The GOP took yet another crack at passing their health-care bill. This is their third attempt, just a word of advice, fellas, if you are having that much trouble passing something, you need to see a doctor...Polls show that only 12 percent of Americans support it. To put that in perspective, 12 percent is the Rotten Tomato score of the talking cat movie Nine Lives. Coincidentally, nine lives is also what you will need to survive Trumpcare,” Colbert sneered.
Mocking the Ted Cruz amendment to the latest Senate GOP health care proposal, Colbert reiterated his belief that Republicans want people to die:
They had to do something radical to make the bill more palatable this time for people to think the bill looked better. So they put something in known as the Ted Cruz amendment. Nothing gets people more excited like the phrase, now with more Ted Cruz — phrase now with more Ted Cruz. Cruz's amendment “would allow insurers to sell cheaper plans with fewer benefits that would likely attract younger and healthier Americans.” So, instead of a comprehensive plan, insurers could charge you a little bit each month for a service that doesn't give you everything you really want. Like Netflix, but you die.
Just like The Washington Post expressing fear that conservative talk radio in the hometown of the far-left Alexandria shooter would lead to violence, the liberal activists-media complex should be the ones under the microscope for inciting violence.
Here’s the relevant transcript from CBS’s The Late Show with Stephen Colbert on July 13:
CBS’s The Late Show with Stephen Colbert
July 13, 2017
11:42 p.m. Eastern
STEPHEN COLBERT: And — [APPLAUSE] of course, Trump's not the only one defending his son. Last night, senior White House advisor and Satan's trophy wife Kellyanne Conway [LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE] appeared on Fox News and used a little visual aid to drive home her point.
KELLYANNE CONWAY [on FNC’s Hannity, 07/12/17]: I just want to review in case you run out of time. This is how I see it so far. This is to help all the people at home. What's the conclusion? Collusion, no. We don't have that yet. I see illusion and delusion, just so we are cleared, everyone. Four words. collusion, no, illusion, delusion, yes, I just thought we what have some fun with words. [LAUGHTER]
COLBERT: Fun, I want to try. Yeah. [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] Got some handy visual aides here. Trump, Jr. tried to articulate, but that turned out to incriminate. [APPLAUSE] Yeah, see easy to remember, it's something even idiot would anticipate, and now he's going to be an inmate. [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] Just thought we’d have some fun with words. Have those — have those sent to the Smithsonian. Let's see, what else. Oh, the GOP, today the GOP took yet another crack at passing their health-care bill. This is their third attempt, just a word of advice, fellas, if you are having that much trouble passing something, you need to see a doctor. Every version so far, up until now, every version of this GOP bill has been incredibly unpopular. Polls show that only 12 percent of Americans support it. To put that in perspective, 12 percent is the Rotten Tomato score of the talking cat movie Nine Lives. Coincidentally, nine lives is also what you will need to survive Trumpcare. They had to — [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] thank you.
JOHN BATISTE: He can't make it.
COLBERT: They had to do something radical to make the bill more palatable this time for people to think the bill looked better. So they put something in known as the Ted Cruz amendment. Nothing gets people more excited like the phrase, now with more Ted Cruz — phrase now with more Ted Cruz. Cruz's amendment “would allow insurers to sell cheaper plans with fewer benefits that would likely attract younger and healthier Americans.” So, instead of a comprehensive plan, insurers could charge you a little bit each month for a service that doesn't give you everything you really want. Like Netflix, but you die. I guess, I guess the White House was expecting a bad score from the Congressional Budget Office cuz yesterday, they released an attack ad claiming the CBO makes its estimates inaccurately. But here's the thing, the White House actually had to pull that ad because they misspelled the word “innaccurately.” [LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE] in-n-accurately. Oh, oh, that — [APPLAUSE] I got to say, that is ironic with a capital “Y.”
