Colbert Explains Connection Between Liberals and Vampires: 'They Scream When They See a Cross'

While Stephen Colbert usually regulates his humor to bashing Republicans, on the July 24 edition of The Colbert Report the Comedy Central comedian actually made a joke both his liberal and conservative audience could enjoy.

As Colbert’s faux conservative personality expressed his outrage over the “transparent Hollywood attack on Republicans” in HBO’s latest episode of the explicit vampire series True Blood, he joked “we should not be surprised at all that vampires are Democrats. After all, they scream when they see a cross.” (See video below)

Earlier in the segment, Colbert played a clip from True Blood in which the vampires called Republicans “assholes” and “Republic****.” The comedian sarcastically called it Hollywood’s “most devastating critique of a political ideology since Karl Marx published Das Kapi-Taint.”

Though crude, any liberal comedian that is able to point out Hollywood’s ridiculous and insulting attempt to slander Republicans deserves recognition. 

See transcript below:

Comedy Central
The Colbert Report
July 25, 2014
11:36 p.m. Eastern
1 minute and 56 seconds


STEPHEN COLBERT: Which is why I am so sad to give a wag of my finger to True Blood for making my blood truly boil with last week's episode, in which the vampires snuck into a benefit for Ted Cruz in a transparent Hollywood attack on Republicans.

TRUE BLOOD CLIP:

>> The second I told her that’s where  mommy and daddy were going, he hung up.

>> Looks like we're going to a gala.

>> Security's going to be tight. And they only invited assholes.

>> We can be assholes.  

>> Of all of the horrible things I’ve seen over the last hundred years, this could be the most disturbing.

>> Oh my god-- I'm a republic***.

COLBERT: Did you hear that? Did you hear that? A Republi-c word I can't say. Well played Hollywood, that is the most devastating critique of a political ideology since Karl Marx published Das Kapi-Taint. And I'm not the only conservative upset by True Blood’s bleeding heart into mouth agenda.

STEVE DOOCEY: Sunday night's episode of HBO’s True Blood series was a conservative bashfest. But the vulgarity of attacks has many asking, did the show go too far?

FOX & FRIENDS GUEST: What folks need to understand is that TV is all about attitude implantation, it's all about creating feelings inside of you. Here is the thing, most people don't actually know who Ted Cruz is. They tend to vote based on the feelings that they have, largely implanted by the entertainment industry.

COLBERT: Well said. TV entertainment drives our political discourse. Remember no one was talking about income inequality until the debut of Two Broke Girls but we-- we should not be surprised at all that vampires are Democrats. After all, they scream when they see a cross.

Laura Flint
Laura Flint is a 2014 summer intern for the MRC's News Analysis Division.