The election must be close. The Sunday Comics section (at least of The Washington Post) is loaded with liberal themes today. Doonesbury, of course, is mocking Joe the Plumber. Non Sequitur is mocking Sarah Palin and Rupert Murdoch/Fox News. Candorville has a bizarre vote-suppressing spokesman at the door telling a black man he shouldn’t vote because "millions of minorities, elderly, poor and injured veterans have been accidentally electocuted by voting machines."
Non Sequitur (by Wiley Miller) begins with a newscaster announcing that Sarah Palin has dropped out of the race, and has been replaced with Captain Coastal Eddie. The interview with a child interviewer mocks Palin’s interviews.
INTERVIEWER: Can you tell us your qualifications in foreign policy, Capt. Eddie?
EDDIE: Well...When I’m haulin’ in my lobstah traps on a cleah day, I can see Nova Scotia.
INTERVIEWER: Excellent! And being a captain, I presume you have military experience.
EDDIE: Ah-yeh...Every summah I lead a brigade of Union soldiers in civil wah re-enactments.
INTERVIEWER: And what are your views on the Bush Doctrine?
EDDIE: You mean replacing divots when he plays as Arundel golf cahse?
The newscaster realizes the story is fake. The child interviewer’s sister (also a child) is holding a cell phone and says "It’s Daddy...he says making up stuff and passiing it off as news is illegal."
The child interviewer says "Yeah, right...You don’t see Rupert Murdoch in prison do you?"
The child characters are Danae Pyle (the interviewer) and her sister Kate. Danae is described as a "pre-adolescent, atheist, semi-goth girl with a pessimistic view of the world, often employed in the strip for satirical purposes."
Candorville (by Darrin Bell) has its lead character Lemont Brown, a black man, facing off against an unseen solicitor trying to suppress his vote:
SOLICITOR: Hello, young, low-income, or minority voter. Don’t forget to vote this Saturday.
LEMONT: You mean Tuesday.
SOLICITOR: And remember, if you’re a student and your parents claimed you as a dependent, you’re ineligible to vote...
LEMONT: Huh? That’s a lie.
SOLICITOR: ...And if you vote, you’ll lose your financial aid and health insurance.
LEMONT: You’re crazy.
SOLICITOR: If you haven’t paid your taxes and you vote, you’ll be audited.
LEMONT (slamming door): "OK, that’s it. Get lost.
SOLICITOR (behind closed door): If y ou have a Spanish surname and you try to vote, you might be deported to Cuba. Millions of minorities, elderly, poor and injured veterans have been accidentally electocuted by voting machines.
LEMONT: I'm not listening!
Candorville is syndicated by the Washington Post Writers Group and boasts it "appeals to socially conscious readers everywhere."
Doonesbury (by the always hectoring Garry Trudeau) mocks Joe the Plumber indirectly, suggesting all you need a plumber for is a pipe fix, not any ignorant conservative politics. A man comes home and finds the plumber there. His wife says she came home to a flooded kitchen.
MAN (to plumber): What’s the diagnosis?
PLUMBER: Looks like you got a busted shuttlecock?
MAN: You mean, ball cock shutoff?
PLUMBER: Well, that may be the fancy term for it...
MAN: But isn’t a ball cock valve in a toilet?
PLUMBER: Well, technically, I suppose. But a leak’s a leak!
MAN: Wouldn’t it help if you turned off the supply lines first?
PLUMBER: Well, yeah, some elitist licensed plumber might do it that way. But I’d rather use good ‘ol common sense.
MAN: You don’t know a thing about plumbing, do you?
PLUMBER: No, but I agree with you on abortion.
WIFE: He does, honey – I checked.