Stephen King

"One only wishes Wayne LaPierre and his NRA board of directors could be drafted to some of these [violent] scenes, where they would be required to put on booties and rubber gloves and help clean up the blood, the brains, and the chunks of intestine still containing the poor wads of half-digested food that were some innocent bystander’s last meal."

So wrote horror writer Stephen King in a Kindle essay Friday entitled "Guns."

He's baaaaaack!

Bestselling fiction author Stephen King took to the liberal publication the Daily Beast Monday to hurl some classically left-wing attacks, filled with some classically left-wing vulgarity, at fiscally minded conservatives such as New Jersey Governor Chris Christie in a piece aptly titled "Tax Me, for F@%&’s Sake!" (serious vulgarity warning):

Occupy Wall Street attacks income inequality and the richest 1 percent, adopting as its slogan ''we are the 99 percent.'' In October, its protesters staged a ''millionaires march' 'in New York City, parading to the homes of wealthy citizens such as Rupert Murdoch and David Koch. But only some riches bother the Occupiers, who have ignored the massive wealth of celebrities in their own ranks.

The top 25 richest celebrities supporting Occupy Wall Street, according to the website Celebrity Net Worth, possess a combined net worth just over $4 billion.

According to Stephen King, conservative "hate" of Barack Obama is similar to the anger that led to the assassination of John Kennedy. Appearing on Friday's Hardball to promote "11/22/63," his new novel, the author compared, "Here is where hate will get you eventually. This is what happens. Finally, it's the barrel of a gun."

Discussing his book, a work of historical fiction about stopping JFK's murder, King asserted, "And also, there's also been this sort of atmosphere of real hate and obstructionism that surrounded both men." He continued, "So, I began to think history repeats itself and at that point I thought to myself, 'You know I really would like to write this book.'" It took liberal anchor Chris Matthews to point out the obvious: Lee Harvey Oswald was no conservative.

Horror writer Stephen King on Tuesday bashed Ronald Reagan and a number of Republicans at a Wake the State rally in Sarasota, Florida.

His main beef with conservatives is they allow him to pay too little in taxes (video follows with partial transcript and commentary):

Glenn Beck and Bill O'Reilly on Thursday had some fun at author Stephen King's expense.

As NewsBusters reported Monday, King in an Entertainment Weekly column called Beck "crazy" and a "nutcase."

When O'Reilly asked his guest if he knew who King was, Beck marvelously responded, "He's the guy that usually when I release my books at the same time, he's No. 2."

After the "O'Reilly Factor" host read the EW quote to Beck, the fun really started (video follows with transcript and commentary, relevant section at 4:08):  

Best-selling novelist Stephen King slammed Glenn Beck as a "crazy" "nutcase" and Rush Limbaugh as a cynical huckster in his August 6, 2010 Entertainment Weekly column. The horror author derided Limbaugh as having "no conviction in that sonorous, slightly flabby voice."

King attacked the radio star for supposedly not being sympathetic enough to the plight of Lindsay Lohan's drug problem. Yet, he provided no quotes or real examples, just a vague summary. The liberal writer complained of Limbaugh, "There's a hollowness there, and a patronizing undertone when he interacts with callers (who are called Dittoheads for a reason)."

In his Entertainment Weekly column, horror writer Stephen King lauded the AMC program Breaking Bad for "examining the American dream: shiny and addictive on top, hollow at the core. And dark. Very dark." (Hasn’t King made millions of dollars off the "hollow" American dream?)

In his December 11 piece, King ranked the program as the best on TV and gushed over the "brilliant, terrifying, shocking" show. In a unique choice, he also praised Rachel Maddow as "insightful" and "pretty in a no-nonsense way."

Breaking Bad stars Bryan Cranston as a high school chemistry teacher with lung cancer who begins selling methamphetamine. King cooed that the program "started as an indictment of the drug culture and America’s shoddy treatment of those who fall victim to catastrophic illnesses..."

If you thought that you were going to escape being greenwashed by simply changing the channel for NBC's "Green Week," think again. Now you can't even wile away your time reading a good ol' fashioned thriller. Stephen King's new book, "Under the Dome," depicts a small city on the brink of an environmental disaster (that is, if it can survive the murders, arson, and corruption, of course).

Set in fictional Chester's Mill, Maine, the 1,000+ page tome (King's longest since "It") details the demise of a small town that mysteriously becomes stuck under an invisible, impenetrable dome.

The town faces such King clichés as deception, rape, and drug addiction, but it also discovers that it's on the fast track to environmental doom. The book review by Kevin Kelly of Mercury News describes the town's desperate situation.

"You can't see the dome - until it becomes smudged on the outside by the accumulation of smog and things running into it and leaving stains," he said. "With no steady influx of new air, Chester's Mill begins to smell like a locker room and plants start dying, and as the dome becomes more and more smeared with grime from the outside world, the temperature inside climbs."

Here's something Stephen King might want to read before scoffing at military service.

A new study shows women and minorities are more satisfied in general with their jobs than white men in the military and that military women are generally much more positive about their career and career prospects than their civilian counterparts, according to a new study.

Newsweek's Sarah Kliff has the story in a Web exclusive (emphasis mine):

It appears three times isn't a charm for horror author Stephen King, who in his third attempt at explaining his peculiar remarks about people who can't read ending up in the Army still couldn't muster the strength to apologize to those he's offended.

I guess in his world, literacy means never having to say you're sorry.

On the upside, at least this time he didn't tell anybody to shut up, or blame the outrage on "Guys like [Noel Sheppard who] take their cues from [conservative commentators Rush] Limbaugh and [Bill] O'Reilly."

So, we've got that going for us...which is nice.

But before we get there, let's look at King's strike three as posted at his website Wednesday (emphasis added):

For Stephen King's benefit, our friends at Are We Lumberjacks have updated an hysterical picture from November 2006 which humorously mocked John Kerry's offensive anti-military remark:

Horror author Stephen King's comments regarding illiteracy and the military have drawn criticism from the United States Army according to a report by CBS-TV affiliate in Washington, DC, WUSA channel 9.

As NewsBusters reported Monday, King recently told a group of high school students at the Library of Congress, "If you don't [read], then you've got, the Army, Iraq, I don't know, something like that."

According to WUSA, Paul Boyce of Army Public Affairs issued the following statement (video embedded right):

The battle between NewsBusters and horror novelist Stephen King went national Tuesday when the Associated Press picked up the story.

For those that haven't been following this, on Monday, NewsBusters reported King's disgraceful comments -- made in front of a group of high school students at the Library of Congress in April -- about people who can't read having few options other than to enlist in the Army.

This surprisingly prompted King to post a blurb at his website encouraging readers to send a message to me stating, "Hi, Noel—Stephen King says to shut up and I agree."

Now, the AP has expressed its view of this squabble, of course, with no mention of King's sorry call-to-arms (emphasis added):

The saga of horror novelist Stephen King's disgraceful comments about America's military took an interesting turn Monday when shortly after instructing visitors to his website to send me a message stating "Hi, Noel—Stephen King says to shut up and I agree," his own message boards were shut down.

This followed the creation of a number of threads by members that wanted to comment about King's remarks.

The cover-story for shutting down the boards came from the Moderator in a thread entitled "Stephen King Insults Soldiers":

You really can't make this stuff up!

Early Monday morning, NewsBusters informed readers about a truly disgraceful comment made last month by famed horror author Stephen King concerning people that can't read having to enter the Army (video embedded right).

Hours later, I mentioned in the comments section that I was receiving a lot of strange e-mail messages.

Well, it turns out King wrote about my piece at his website, and instructed readers to "find Sheppard on the internet" -- please notice the embedded link goes to my NewsBusters blog! -- and write me with text that included "Hi, Noel—Stephen King says to shut up and I agree":

Remember shortly before Election Day 2006 when Sen. John Kerry (D-MA) suggested that if you don't get a good education, "you get stuck in Iraq" (video available here)?

Well, last month, famed horror author Stephen King was speaking in front of a group of high school students at the Library of Congress, and he virtually made the exact same statement.

For those that can bear it, what follows is another in a long line of liberal media members bashing the military (embedded right, h/t Terry Ann):