Kiefer Sutherland

Six Ways Jack Bauer Will Fight Global Warming

Jim Treacher at DailyGut.com has an excellent slam of how loopy and left-wing Fox's "24" is becoming with its carbon-neutral push for Season 7.

Six Ways Jack Bauer Will Fight Global Warming:

  1. Travel from one end of LA to another in 15 minutes on a bicycle.
  2. Replace power-sucking PDA with pad of Post-Its and No. 2 pencil. ("Chloe, send it to my sticky note.")
  3. Yelling releases excess carbon dioxide into the atmosphere. Interrogations will be conducted via sign language and harsh glaring.
  4. After torturing terrorist with plugged-in lamp cord, buy carbon offsets to make up for wasted electricity.
  5. All explosions will be rendered South Park-style with red, yellow, and orange construction paper (recycled).
  6. Cancel the show because it sucks now anyway.

(I'm doing my part by recycling this post!)

My working theory is that the show's creators have been cowed into making penance to the Left for hanging out with conservative radio host Rush Limbaugh. Thoughts?

Satire: Jack Bauer Gets Global Warming Mission

With Saturday's revelation that the hit television series "24" has gone carbon neutral, it only seems logical that some episodes next year might involve characters advancing anti-global warming principles or taking green measures to protect the environment.

Some have suggested lead character Jack Bauer, played by Kiefer Sutherland, might drive a Toyota Prius, for example.

Well, taking the possibilities to a conceivably absurd level for their comedic potential, NB member AGW Heretic has penned a wonderful idea that I certainly hope the good, green folks at Fox will consider for the upcoming season: