It’s probably not surprising that a columnist who’s boldly liberal enough to declare "I don’t support the troops" and mock Christianity as a "death cult" would talk family members into supporting Barack Obama for president. In this week’s Time magazine, columnist and "humorist" Joel Stein writes about how he worked to convert his liberal Hillary-favoring grandmother in Fort Lauderdale into an Obama voter and puzzled over how Obama can win over Florida Jews. He was "elated" he won his grandma over for Obama:

As I sensed Mama Ann was changing her mind for no good reason, I started to wonder what my good reasons for supporting Obama were. Did I really think that he'd get us out of Iraq all that much faster, that he could actually deliver health care to everyone or that he'd erase the anger between the parties and races? This is a guy, after all, who is no better than I am at stopping his grandmother from saying racist things. Sure, I like that Obama makes people feel optimistic and willing to give, but if I really liked that, I'd have a better attitude toward Scientologists. The truth is, I like Obama because he's young and eats arugula and knows who Ludacris is. Because he's the closest thing to the person I'd really like to vote for: me.

Time magazine’s cover story on George Clooney ("The Last Movie Star") is a flop-sweat valentine from Joel Stein about how excited he was to host the "giant celebrity" Clooney for a bumbling dinner at his house, and how Clooney is an "Olympic-level" guest with his charm and good humor. The Time website even has video from Stein showing how lovable George crawled all over his house looking for the source of a beep. But there is one small break in Clooney’s suavity. He really hates Bill O’Reilly: