NPR’s ‘Wait Wait Don’t Tell Me’: ‘Hobby Lobby Was Originally Named Granny’s Prophylactic Attic’

April 1st, 2014 2:37 PM

NPR’s quiz show “Wait Wait Don’t Tell Me” is known for its unabashed liberalism so it should come as no surprise that the program would mock the Christian crafts store Hobby Lobby in the wake of their Supreme Court case.

The episode, which aired on Saturday March 29, featured guest host Mike Pesca, sports reporter for NPR, who joked that “Hobby Lobby was originally named Granny’s Prophylactic Attic.” The entire panel then proceeded to poke fun at the company for not wanting to cover two forms of birth control it views as ending life. [MP3 audio here.]

The Hobby Lobby jokes occurred during the weekly “Who’s Carl This Time” segment where Pesca described the Supreme Court case as such:

The Supreme Court heard arguments in the case of Sebelius v. Hobby Lobby. At issue, the owners of the chain of arts and crafts stores, based on their religious beliefs, do not want to provide certain kinds of contraception to their employees. Really, though, is there any more effective form of contraception than walking into an arts and crafts store?

Pesca then mocked how he “Was watching a Viagra ad, and it said if your erection last more than four hours, visit a Hobby Lobby.” The NPR correspondent didn’t let up, and continued to mock the Christian store:

But when you get right down to it, mentioning all these things that they sell in the arts and crafts store, couldn't an employee or a customer make their own contraception? Paper mache works great. Stay away from the googly eyes, though. During an amorous evening, are you wearing a rubber? Rubber cement, yeah.

The Hobby Lobby bashing concluded with regular panelist Roy Blount Jr. reciting an “off-color” song: “An impetuous young couple named Kelly are now forced to walk belly to belly because in their haste they used library paste instead of petroleum jelly.”

 

See relevant transcript below.


NPR

Wait Wait Don’t Tell Me

March 29, 2014

 

MIKE PESCA: All right, on to your next quote.

CARL KASELL: Everybody go to Hobby Lobby today to buy glitter for your IUD.

PESCA: That was our own Faith Salie referring to a big case argued where this week?

ANNA PACCHIONI: In the court?

PESCA: Which court? Think a big, big case argued.

PACCHIONI: The court of America?

(APPLAUSE)

TOM BODETT: No, she's thinking of Judge Judy. This is a different one.

PESCA: No, no, I know how to translate from Canadian, and we're going to give her that point.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)(APPLAUSE)

PESCA: It is the Supreme Court. The Supreme Court heard arguments in the case of Sebelius v. Hobby Lobby. At issue, the owners of the chain of arts and crafts stores, based on their religious beliefs, do not want to provide certain kinds of contraception to their employees. Really, though, is there any more effective form of contraception than walking into an arts and crafts store?

(LAUGHTER)

PESCA: In fact, the Hobby Lobby was originally named Granny's Prophylactic Attic.

(LAUGHTER)

PESCA: I think I was watching a Viagra ad, and it said if your erection lasts more than four hours, visit a Hobby Lobby.

(LAUGHTER)(APPLAUSE)

BODETT: Yeah, scrapbooking as foreplay.

ROY BLOUNT JR.: Is it? I mean, maybe it depends on what your hobby is.

PESCA: So, but when you get right down to it, mentioning all these things that they sell in the arts and crafts store, couldn't an employee or a customer make their own contraception? Paper mache works great. Stay away from the googly eyes, though. During an amorous evening, are you wearing a rubber? Rubber cement, yeah.

(LAUGHTER)

PESCA: When you're in the mood, and you have time to let it dry, try rubber cement.

(LAUGHTER)

BLOUNT JR.: I know a really off-color song along those lines. It goes like this. (Singing) An impetuous young couple named Kelly are now forced to walk belly to belly because in their haste they used library paste instead of petroleum jelly.

(LAUGHTER)(APPLAUSE)

PESCA: All available at the Hobby Lobby, yeah.

BLOUNT JR.: I very seldom get to bring that out...

BODETT: Yeah, I haven't heard that in a while, right.

PESCA: I believe Scalia invoked that from the bench, actually, yeah.