Newsweek's 'CW' for 2007 Typically Wallops GOP

December 27th, 2007 4:27 PM

In their year in review issue (dated December 31/January 7), Newsweek sums up its year in the snarky "Conventional Wisdom Watch" box. The box is utterly conventional in its liberal bias, slashing the Republicans in general at year's end:

George W. Bush (DOWN): Manages to stymie Dem Congress. But still has nothing to show for his seven years except no 9/11 sequel. Sad.

Dick Cheney (DOWN): Secretive, trigger-happy fossil-fuel lover is like banker Mr. Potter in "It’s a Wonderful Life." But without the happy ending.

Condi Rice (SIDEWAYS): Condi ‘08! On second thought, there’s a think tank somewhere with a corner office for you and a piano.

Karl Rove (DOWN): Bush’s brain goes from running the world to writing an occasional piece for NEWSWEEK. Now he can leak to himself!

Scooter Libby (DOWN): Cheney’s man convicted of perjury but scoots out of jail thanks to Bush. Let him do community service at Walter Reed.

Even the up arrows came with attacks on conservatives:

Robert Gates (UP): Father 41 knew best: Rummy’s successor at Defense is a fresh breath of sanity. No neocon job here.

The primary candidates are also spun negatively, even with an up arrow:

Rudy Giuliani (DOWN): More baggage than Santa’s sleigh sends him down the chimney in national polls. No fruitcake for Bernie this year.

Mitt Romney (SIDEWAYS): Olympic-class flip-flopper has Reagan’s hair but not his Teflon. One question he won’t answer: Boxers or briefs?

Mike Huckabee (UP): Old: "The Biggest Loser" is a novelty act. New: Attributes ascension to Jesus endorsement.