Satire: Gore Sues Time for ‘Person of the Year’ Recount

December 19th, 2007 5:00 PM

In a stunning announcement Wednesday, Time magazine has named Russian President Vladimir Putin its Person of the Year for 2007.

Obviously, this must have come as a great shock to Nobel Laureate Al Gore who was the odds on favorite to win another dubious honor for becoming a multi-millionaire selling the gullible on the manmade global warming myth.

With that in mind, Pat Sajak penned the following satirical piece depicting how Gore – ever the sore-loser – might respond to this announcement (emphasis added):

Lawyers for former Vice President Al Gore have filed numerous lawsuits against Time magazine, alleging a series of voting irregularities they maintain deprived Gore of Time’s “Person of the Year” Award. It has been announced that Russian President Vladimir Putin received the 2007 award, with Gore finishing second.

Details of the suits are sketchy, but one of them accuses certain unnamed Time employees of denying others the right to vote when it was determined they were leaning toward Gore. Rumors have surfaced that one employee, known only as “Chad”, has confirmed those rumors. Another separate suit claims the voting process to be far too complicated to be understood by, to quote the lawsuit, “a bunch of journalists.” Gore’s lawyers are calling for a recount of the ballots in question. They also demand that independent observers from the United Nations Commission on Climate Change be allowed access to any recount procedures.

Oh no. Here we go again!