Washington Post "investigative humorist" Gene Weingarten mocked conservatives again in Sunday’s Post Magazine, playing off the recent Daily Kos poll playing up the number of Republicans who believe Barack Obama wasn’t born in America, is a racist, and should be impeached. Weingarten makes no mention of the leftist source of his data. For all the reader knows, it’s a Gallup poll. Weingarten then makes up his own poll questions and answers for "humor,’ and the lowest blow is smearing conservatives with an anti-Semitic brush:
Do you trust any mainstream TV or print publications?
Eighty-one percent said, "Only Fox News."
Nineteen percent said, "Only The Protocols of the Elders of Zion."
Here’s more of his fake poll of the right-wing haters:
If Barack Obama were at your feet dying of thirst and you had a cold 2-liter bottle of Diet Pepsi, what would you do?
Seventy-one percent said they would "probably let him lick the sweat off the bottle."
Twelve percent said they would offer him a "nice crouton" or a "couple of saltines."
What animal does Barack Obama remind you of?
Forty-one percent asked, by way of clarification, if a maggot is an animal.
What would you do if a homosexual were at your door?
Forty-one percent said they would keep him or her at bay with a pitchfork or a fire hose until police arrived.
Twenty percent said they would sell their house before the neighborhood got any worse.
Is there anything more exciting than watching people drive cars in circles?
Seventy-six percent said no.
Twenty percent said, "Sex, but only with your spouse, while procreating, through a hole in the sheet."
What is the greatest scientific achievement in the history of humankind?
Twenty-four percent said, "Supply-side economics."
Fifty-nine percent said, "The building of Noah's Ark."
Is it ever okay for men to touch other men?
Twenty-two percent said, "When physically apprehending illegal aliens."
Twenty-six percent said, "During surgery, while wearing appropriate protective garments."
Twenty-nine percent said, "Football."
My friend Tom Johnson noted recently that in one of his regular chats on the Washington Post website, Weingarten sounded downright silly in his enthusiasm for the Big O and his 2012 landslide:
Silver Spring, Md.: Gene, I just saw a blog headline on the WP Web site that is giving me an anxiety attack: "Obama Paves the Way for Palin Presidency". Her joining Fox News makes me believe this is a possibility. You were right about Obama in 08 - what do you predict now?
Gene Weingarten: I predict he will be re-elected in a landslide. Obama has star power, and he has shrewdly packed his first year with bitter pills. The economy will have rebounded when he runs again.
It is not his fault that he was elected in a spasm of national hope, where he was elected to be all things to all people. Or that it takes time to learn the art of presidenting.
Then there is the glorious, bubbly rising tide of Sarah. As the Republican nominee, she will guarantee Obama's reelection. As a third-party nominee, she will guarantee Obama's reelection.