Unicorns!!  You forgot the unicorns!!

(thank you to sarcasmo for the links)

from Dave Barry's DNC column:

The Palin choice is only one of the storylines that will be developing here over the next few days. Another one will be the Republicans' effort to contrast the tone and style of their convention with that of the Democrats, particularly Barack Obama's now-legendary acceptance speech, which he read from stone tablets, in which he promised the American public that if elected he would give them peace, jobs, healthcare, national security, energy independence, good schools, a clean environment, reduced government waste, lower taxes, the head of Osama bin Laden, giant underwater cities, time travel, and a magic flying zebra named ''Sparkle'' for every American pre-schooler regardless of income level.

and from a different DNC column (originally 1 paragraph):

It's hard to blame Sen. Clinton for being bitter. Here she is, the smartest human ever, PLUS she spent all those years standing loyally behind Bill Clinton wearing uncomfortable pantyhose (I mean Hillary was, not Bill) (although there are rumors), PLUS she went to the trouble and expense of acquiring a legal residence in New York State so she could be a senator from there, PLUS she assembled a team of nuclear-physicist-grade genius political advisors, PLUS she spent years going around to every dirtbag community in America explaining in detail her 23-point policy solutions for every single problem facing the nation including soybean blight.

And after all that, she loses the nomination to a guy who has roughly the same amount of executive governmental experience as Hannah Montana. Hillary is like: "Are you KIDDING me?''

A government that robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul.
- George Bernard Shaw, 1944

Not much bounce at all. 

Rocky & Bullwinkle '08