Eliot Is Everywhere! Spitzer Uses MSM 'Spitz Blitz' for Political Comeback

Get caught with your pants (but not black socks) down consorting with hookers after hypocritically spearheading investigations of prostitution rings? No problem if you are a liberal. There is always a chance for political redemption with the aid of the mainstream media. Such was the case this past week with Client # 9 aka Eliot Spitzer. First Spitzer lets us know about the terrible pain of irrelevance in a Fortune magazine article:

...But he also says he is "in unceasing agony" and "incredibly frustrated" over no longer being "where I would like to be" -- finishing his first term as governor of New York. "Anybody who says disengaging from it in any way is easy is not being straightforward," he says. "Obviously, removing myself the way I did is that much more painful."

Aww... So sad. Cue up the violin music. And Spitzer is so humble in suggesting what sort of political job he would like...while slamming a fellow democrat:

Spitzer muses with friends and advisers about political targets. He views New York's U.S. Senator Kirsten Gillibrand as a lightweight. In the office of New York state comptroller, he sees a chance to become a national force, wielding the billions held in public pension funds to force corporate reform in a way that even lawsuits and regulation cannot.

So if Gillibrand loses her Senate election in November, should she send a note of appreciation to Spitzer?

Of course, Mr. Modesty couldn't be satisfied with just that comptroller job. He is looking for a grander political comeback as governor again as you can see in this television news report.

Still not convinced that Spitzer is in an orchestrated media campaign to return to politics? Then check out this FishBowlDC report:

For the first time, former N.Y. Gov. Eliot Spitzer has stepped in as guest host of MSNBC's Dylan Ratigan show. The once scandal-torn lawmaker filled in yesterday, and this afternoon he's in the host chair once again. 

Of course, no liberal political comeback is complete without a loving profile in the New York Times with an appropriate dewy eyed title, Spitzer's Long Road to Redemption:

It’s been scarcely two years since Mr. Spitzer, his ashen-faced wife at his side, seemed to have written his political obituary, with his taut-jawed, almost lipless grimace of resignation as governor of New York, following disclosures that he was a client in a prostitution ring. Now he is emphatically back, seemingly everywhere. 

For public figures whose falls have been as spectacular as that of Mr. Spitzer’s, there are many time-tested paths to image rehab. Seclusion. Prison. Good works. The seminary.

None of those options, it seems, are for Eliot Spitzer.

Of course not. Too time consuming. Much easier to just go on a media blitz as this past week with the aid of incredibly sympathetic liberal MSM allies. Oh, and did you know that there is a Spitzer bio coming out in a week? Who's writing it? Peter Elkind, the same guy who interviewed Spitzer for the Fortune article.

What next? Spitzer: The Musical? Silly... but wait! There actually is a parody song about Spitzer written by Charles Henrickson who chronicled in song the MSM Spitz Blitz.  So follow the bouncing ball and sing along Puttin' On The Blitz to the tune of Puttin' On The Ritz:

If you’re through
And you don’t know
How to get you
Back in the show
Just do like Spitz
Puttin’ on the blitz

Talking heads
Who need to fill time
Hope it spreads
And pretty soon I’m
News that fits
Puttin’ on the blitz

Hoping I won’t look like such a loser
Tryin’ to get booked on Anderson Cooper
Or Jon Stewart

I’ll impress
The Rachel Maddows
Talk as guest
On good or bad shows
Do my bits
Puttin’ on the blitz

Have you seen Keith Olbermann
Hey, I’m such an Oprah fan
Say I’ll pay to be their guest
Think their show is each the best
Huge hits
I’ll boost their rating
I’m Spitz
My checkbook’s waiting
Spending every buck
For a change in my luck

If you’re through
And you don’t know
How to get you
Back in the show
Just do like Spitz
Puttin’ on the blitz

Talking heads
Who need to fill time
Hope it spreads
And pretty soon I’m
News that fits
Puttin’ on the blitz

Hoping I won’t look like such a loser
Tryin’ to get booked on Anderson Cooper
Or Jon Stewart

I’ll impress
The Rachel Maddows
Talk as guest
On good or bad shows
Do my bits
Puttin’ on the blitz

{Tapdancing with the Stars}

Hoping I won’t look like such a loser
Tryin’ to get booked on Anderson Cooper
Or Jon Stewart

If you’re through
And you don’t know
How to get you
Back in the show
Just do like Spitz
Puttin’ on the blitz
Puttin’ on the blitz
Puttin’ on the blitz
Puttin’ on the blitz . . .

P.J. Gladnick
P.J. Gladnick
P.J. Gladnick is a freelance writer and creator of the DUmmie FUnnies blog.