Don't Put All Your Limousine Liberals in One Basket

September 21st, 2005 3:26 PM

The NY Times is thrilled with the idea of reporters being red carpet walking stars.

Much has been written in the news media as of late about the news media and how all of a sudden they've been acting like the news media. Well, color us nostalgic, but it was with great delight that we went to the 26th Annual News and Documentary Emmy Awards ceremony at the Marriott Marquis on Monday night and witnessed this inspiring sight: reporters walking the red carpet. We saw CNN, for example, interviewing CHRISTIANE AMANPOUR about reporting. This is what journalism is about, ladies and gentlemen. Should be about.

Yes, indeed. That's what journalism should be about; a liberal hack network talking to a liberal politically motivated hack reporter who is married to a liberal hack politician.

ANDERSON COOPER was expected but did not show up, as we understood that he was standing outside the New Orleans airport challenging all incoming federal officials to one-armed wrestling matches.

This was later retracted when it turned out Cooper was only challenging female officials and had yet to win a single match. He was later seen enraged, throwing his extra Vanderbilt panties against a wall.

"I'm never comfortable on this side of the rope, and I find myself thinking one red carpet too many," said Mr. Rather, when we asked how it felt, as a reporter, being interviewed by reporters. He wasn't finished. "I think this kind of experience is like a lot of things in life. It's O.K. to have every once in a while, especially if you don't take yourself too seriously while you do it. But you wouldn't want to do it too often. Then I think you'd start inhaling some sort of egocentric gas that can be lethal."

Dan Rather? Egocentric? Well we wouldn't want that to happen! Hey Dan, that isn't a gas the stars inhale, it's a powder. He's finished now.