Sad, Bizarre Attempt at Humor Reveals Stephanie Miller as Seriously Unfunny
Never heard of liberal radio host Stephanie Miller? You're about to hear a reason why.
Here's an example of Miller sharing with her listeners earlier this week what she considers humorous. Before playing this, you may want to clear any children -- and pets -- out of earshot.
Audio clip after page break
MILLER: Chris!
MILLER SHOW PRODUCER CHRIS LAVOIE: What?
MILLER: I then went to Charlotte, N.C., where as you know my 88-year-old Republican mother and my Republican brother, who hung me when I was a child, live.
LAVOIE: Yes.
MILLER: And I think it's important to mention at this point that my mom's bird masturbates to Fox News.
LAVOIE: Yup, um, um ...
MILLER: Now, in all fairness, I had been warned about this because if anything can be compared to your 88-year-old Republican mother who raised you Catholic explaining to you how her bird masturbates, I don't know what's more disturbing. In my personal opinion, she sort of did what he does with his arms, except she had trouble with the word. She's like, oh Stephy, what's the word, masturbate. I was like, oh, I know, wow.
LAVOIE: Yeah, Republicans.
MILLER: This is going to be years of therapy now. And as I previously said, my mom at her age, she sits very close, if she were any closer to Glenn Beck she would be, it would be poltergeist. She would be in the TV spooning with Glenn Beck. So, uh, the Fox News on all the time and the bird, love bird, it's a love bird named Pretty Boy and 'cause, you know what, many people have asked me, how, how does a bird masturbate? 'Cause, you know, no hands, no opposable thumbs. Well, let me explain. He has a colorful chain, a colorful sort of rubber, you know, they have lots of sort of colorful bird toys in there. And so he has a chain that he sits on, it's like a rubber chain. It's a perch, you know, it's like a perch ...
LAVOIE: Yes, that's a chain.
MILLER: Oh, it's also a chain that he regurgitates his food on and eats it again. By the way, the cage right next to the dinner table. So that's already, uh huh. And so anyway, what happens is he sort of gets going on the chain, he kind of just sort of, here I'm doing it, if you're watching Ustream you see he kind of does this, he rocks into the thing with his, you know, he pushes his little (beep), you know, into the chain. It's not a chain, it's a rubber thing, whatever, anyway, he starts, he just starts and then he does this thing, now you'll have to be on Ustream to see. He kinda raises his little, what are they, wings?, above his head and goes (breathes heavily) and then kinda lays on the chain exhausted, uh, to Fox News.
Brian Maloney at The Radio Equalizer justifiably asks, "Is This Libtalk's Most Pathetic Moment?"
Miller's father is the late William E. Miller, Barry Goldwater's running mate in 1964 who also served as chairman of the National Republican Committee. Suffice it to say, the surviving elder Miller must be so proud.
- Jack Coleman's blog
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Comments
Bird brain
Submitted by DontFeedTheTrolls on Thu, 03/31/2011 - 2:26pm.
They 'hung' her as a child? What, is she claiming she is brain dead?
RE: Bird Brain
Submitted by Bill Brasky on Thu, 03/31/2011 - 2:31pm.
Cleary the woman suffered brain damage from the "hanging" as a child.
I listened to the whole thing.
Submitted by Red Jeep on Thu, 03/31/2011 - 2:29pm.
Why? ...I guess in utter amazement at the stupidity.
Sad.
Submitted by IdahoJim on Thu, 03/31/2011 - 2:30pm.
Sounds like she will go to extremes to NOT be like Daddy and Mommy.
IdahoJim
http://idahoandy.net
I can see why she is still on he air
Submitted by c5then on Thu, 03/31/2011 - 2:36pm.
This is riviting stuff that everyone needs to know.
I don't now how she is not nationally syndicated accross the whole country during prime time.
/Sarc
Madison and Jefferson and Franklin built a Republic - Roberts killed it!
"...who hung me when I was a child,..."
Submitted by Dave. on Thu, 03/31/2011 - 2:42pm.
Sounds like her brother was incompetent. :-^)
-Dave
Vote for the American in November
WHAT AM I TO DO?
Submitted by Herbster on Thu, 03/31/2011 - 2:50pm.
I'm sorry. Am I supposed to laugh? I didn't. Does this mean I will be sent to a reeducation camp for people who don't laugh at morons who are not funny?
Oh, the humanity...........
Why is this even an entry?
Submitted by Satchmo on Thu, 03/31/2011 - 2:51pm.
Why is this even an entry?
Why don't you explain
Submitted by Blonde on Thu, 03/31/2011 - 2:56pm.
....why it shouldn't be, instead of attacking the bloggers here, like a liberal troll?
Handy Reference Guide to Obama's Gaffes and Goofs ~ Currently Numbering 200 (and Counting)
Meow!
Submitted by Henry Clay on Thu, 03/31/2011 - 3:58pm.
Meow!
Bugger off, Henry
Submitted by Blonde on Thu, 03/31/2011 - 4:02pm.
I've already exhausted my patience for feckless liberal shills today.
Handy Reference Guide to Obama's Gaffes and Goofs ~ Currently Numbering 200 (and Counting)
Its content speaks for itself
Submitted by Jack Coleman on Thu, 03/31/2011 - 2:58pm.
Then there's the added benefit of irritating you
It doesn't irritate me, and I
Submitted by Satchmo on Thu, 03/31/2011 - 3:33pm.
It doesn't irritate me, and I didn't ask for an explanation of the content; I asked why this is an entry. I would think you of all people would be able to explain. Or maybe you can't, but saying the content speaks for itself is just a dodge.
"Then there's the added benefit of irritating you"
Submitted by Dave. on Thu, 03/31/2011 - 3:38pm.
LOL - Works fer me.
In fact, I'm pretty sure that works for most of us here. :-)
-Dave
Vote for the American in November
Exactly, Dave
Submitted by Blonde on Thu, 03/31/2011 - 3:45pm.
Two thumbs up!!!!
Handy Reference Guide to Obama's Gaffes and Goofs ~ Currently Numbering 200 (and Counting)
Why are you even here?
Submitted by SickofLibs on Thu, 03/31/2011 - 3:01pm.
Now get back over to that civil war thread and tell us more about how Abraham Lincoln really sucked.
I've listened to her show before...
Submitted by ProudAmerican58 on Thu, 03/31/2011 - 2:56pm.
That was 5 minutes and several brain cells I will never get back.
As a lifelong cockatiel fan, I must strenuously object
Submitted by SickofLibs on Thu, 03/31/2011 - 2:58pm.
to the footage of the male cockatiel as the implied "masturbator." Miller clearly states that the bird in question was a lovebird.
For those posters unfamiliar with small parrots, lovebirds not kept in pairs can indeed develop nasty habits, including aggressiveness and obsessive sexual acts such as described by Miller.
An example of this is the lovebird pair known as Troggieboy and Frankieboy... when one is missing, the other becomes abnormally aggressive, even to the point of exhibiting biting behavior and feather plucking.
Cockatiels keep singly do not have these problems.
Thank you.
This woman is seriously
Submitted by ForeverOnTheRight on Thu, 03/31/2011 - 2:59pm.
This woman is seriously crass. Their is nothing funny nor relevant to the world out of what she said. I think her therapist needs to hear this not the world.
How Rush has more listeners
Submitted by VBaxter on Thu, 03/31/2011 - 3:39pm.
How Rush has more listeners than her, is beyond me.
Ron Paul 2012
Maybe...
Submitted by Ed Gregory on Thu, 03/31/2011 - 3:43pm.
...she's projecting? She sure does say a lot of stuff about toys.
I'll bet she had Mike Malloy
Submitted by Ed Gregory on Thu, 03/31/2011 - 3:48pm.
I'll bet she had Mike Malloy and Ron Reagan peeing in their diapers when she told them the story.
Lack of Sex Makes Liberals Say Outrageous Things!
Submitted by gruyere cheese on Thu, 03/31/2011 - 4:14pm.
This explains comments made by Maher and this airhead. Take a serious look at LIberal women and some men, and ask yourself why are they always bringing sex into their commentaries/opinions? Is probably, because they don't get any, as they are too preocupied with getting their messiah re-elected and trashing Sarah, Michelle, Beck, Limbaugh and Fox News. Now, take a look at Michelle, Sarah, Nikki Haley and some of the chicas on Fox News....these women may be conservative, but they are smart, intelligent and certainly take good care of themselves.
BIRDS OF A FEATHER
Submitted by JPTSO3 on Thu, 03/31/2011 - 6:16pm.
When her mother passes, Miller should get, as her inheritance, nothing but the bird. She and the bird will get along famously. It will metaphorically represent her audience:
1. Birdbrained
2. Beady eyes
3. No visible penis
4. Boney legs and shoeless feet
5. Bobs its head in mindless agreement.
6. Regurgitates the same vomit, over and over
7. Craps in its own water and drinks it
8. Jobless and dependent on an authoritative figure to feed it
9. Comfortable behind bars
10 Speaks only what its handler repeats but has no idea what its "saying"…
She probably masterbates the bird
Submitted by brutony1 on Thu, 03/31/2011 - 6:04pm.
it gives both of them something to do, and fulfills their sex lives together,since without each one the other wouldnt have anyone. Of course, the bird has an excuse-its locked up in a cage, all alone, every day-whats Stephie boys reason?
When will liberals WAKE UP AND SMELL THE COFFEE! -Me
MILLER: "This is going to be years of therapy now."
Submitted by Colt on Thu, 03/31/2011 - 8:46pm.
Oh really? Show me a liberal that doesn't need therapy whenever somebody screws up their order at Starbucks,.. Un-friends them on Facebook,..or, has to wait around like a 'common person' - for the cable guy to show up.
Besides, I know a couple of birds that beat off to every syllable that (p)resident Gilligan utters...
...Olberman, and Matthews,.... both of whom, are Chickens.
She really does need therapy!
Submitted by CobraMan on Thu, 03/31/2011 - 8:54pm.
I have never seen any sane person ramble like that! There's no coherency to any of what she said!
The Citizens of each State shall be entitled to all Privileges and Immunities of Citizens in the several States. The US Constitution
Unless you're a fetus. The US Supreme Court
Or Anwar al-Awlaki.
Is It Not Funny Because She's A Liberal?
Submitted by TheReal7Sticks on Thu, 03/31/2011 - 9:25pm.
See, all this whining here best describes how talk radio has been ruined. Phil Hendrie has said it over and over again that the rush to transform talk radio into news talk stations both left and right. Gone are the glory days of Wolfman Jack, Dr. Demento, Howard Stern, Adam Corolla, Bubba the Love Sponge, Opie and Anthony, Tom Leykis and such. Now all you've got are a thousand imitators of Rush Limbaugh, Glenn Beck, Mike Malloy, left-wing and right-wing. And if you even attempt to have some fun on the radio, in comes the FCC and the letter writers who only want boring old news and opinions to make them get pissed off. There's more to life than whether Bush is Hitler or Obama is a socialist; Just listen to a classic Phil Hendrie program from the last fifteen years, and you can actually find anything funny, whether it's skull-f***ing, child molestation, racists, liberal hippies who stick turkey basters up their butts to protest war, detectives who have swine flu, you name it. That's what real talk radio is all about.
-"I'm Gary Dupree, that's me!"
'Scuse me while I whip this out
Submitted by DoktorFranken on Fri, 04/01/2011 - 12:56am.
''They told me you was hung!''
''And they was RIGHT!''
Below-the-waist Lib obsession
Submitted by Pilgrim1949 on Fri, 04/01/2011 - 9:29am.
Following her verbal masturbation of orgasmic, self-exalting delight one wonders if she is dying to ask the listening audience -- both of them, listening via the institution's speakers embedded within the padded walls of their rooms -- whether it was as good for them as it obviously was for her.
Yet another offering of tolerant, reasoned and intelligent discourse that is supposed to serve as a shining example for the great unwashed massed to emulate (or was it "immolate"? I forget...).
Most adults eventually graduate from genital- and potty-centric humor once they leave behind the hormonal and psychological confines of adolescence.
Some people enter their second childhood while others never quite leave their first.
Let's hear a great big Bronx Cheer for the New Civility to which we now must all adhere (or ve vill severely vhip you into compliance, ya?)
The sad irony of so much of the crass and violent rhetoric of our peace-loving, tolerant "betters" is a head-shaking wonder to behold.
"Ye canne change the laws of physics....." but some politicians believe that with the right legislation you can pretend they don't really apply to your own pet projects...
Miller illustrates why
Submitted by Beukeboom on Fri, 04/01/2011 - 9:32am.
Miller illustrates why liberal talk radio doesn't succeed in most of the United States.