‘SKIP SCHOOL AND STRIKE!’ Hollywood Demands Kids Join Climate Strike

September 20th, 2019 6:00 PM

If you’re not skipping school for the sake of the climate, you're probably not a conscientous citizen, well at least not in the eyes of the progressives in Hollywood. Celebs were overjoyed at the sight of millions of young people around the world taking to the streets for 15-year-old pied piper Greta Thunberg and her climate change hysteria. People like Ellen DeGeneres and Michael Moore tweeted their support for the next generation who seem hell bent on the elites taking even more freedom away from them.

So what if celebrities are still flying international and eating overpriced steaks? At least they’re with them in spirit.

Daytime talk show idol and smiling pop culture sponsor of groupthink, Ellen DeGeneres, lavished praise on Greta and her sourpuss, capitalist-hating visage, tweeting, “I see you, @GretaThunberg. I support you. #ClimateStrike.” Alright lady, we hope you’re riding your bike to the studio every day, not eating meat and swearing off flying. Or you could just not champion a kid being used as a political prop and live how you want.

Musical theater has been Bette Midler encouraged some good, old-fashioned hooky for the sake of the “Green New Deal” on Friday, tweeting out to all her followers the hope that they’d shirk their real priorities for imaginary ones. The actress wrote, “SKIP SCHOOL AND STRIKE! The ones with the most to lose take matters into their own hands since their elders are incapable, apathetic, or just plain stupid.” Oh yeah, Bette. Good call on leaving the fate of the planet to twelve-year-olds. And she's calling other people “apathetic” and “plain stupid?”

Whoopi Goldberg tweeted her blessings to the young climate strikers, writing, “To all the young people marching around the world demanding action on climate change you can no longer be discounted because of your age & makes you a force to be reckoned with...” Uh, why, exactly? Well, because they support her own whacked out beliefs. So, they’re genius kids.

We’re sure if a baby babbled something that inadvertently sounded like “F Trump,” it would get a Whoopi retweet and a guest spot on The View.

Filmmaker Michael Moore got real dark, claiming that adults have failed the kids who will be choked “to death” by the planet someday. He tweeted, “They know when they’re our age they will be clinging to life, clawing & clamoring for survival as the planet chokes to death the humans who tried to kill it.” He added, “The planet will kill us before it lets us kill the planet. Trust me on this.” Geez, dude, what is this? The plot of a Roland Emmerich film? Also, man, are you going to diet for the cause? Your personal carbon footprint looks quite significant, if you catch our drift.

Brooklyn Nine-Nine (NBC) actress Melissa Fumero tweeted out an apocalyptic NowThis video featuring Great Thunberg’s over-the-top warning about “mass extinction.” She captioned the video with her hope that “the kids are gonna save us all. They shouldn’t have to, but we didn’t give them a choice.” Sure, or they might be the death of us all. But since NowThis says we must believe Greta, we are compelled.